


look at you strawberry (blonde)

by orphan_account



Category: Naruto
Genre: BAMF Lee, BAMF Sakura, Cross-Posted on FanFiction.Net, F/M, Gai adopts Lee, Haruno Sakura-centric, Harunos are good parents, Hatake Kakashi is a Bad Teacher, Healthy Relationships, I didn't lose motivation or anything, I just broke my phone lmao, IRUKA DEBUE IRUKA DEBYU, No longer on hiatus, On Hiatus, Pre-Chuunin Exams, Quite Literally, THE FLAVOR, Then I Will Simply Not Acknowledge Them, Training Montage, Uchiha Sasuke : If They Do Not Aid Me In My Revenge, Umino Iruka Adopts Uzumaki Naruto, a wild sasuke appears, and habit of pushing away people you love, and he's "gasp", and i here is synonymous with sakura, and instantly likes them, and porn addiction, and slight depression, author finally gonna get them glasses, bc I said so, bc fuck yea gimmie that sexy validation, bottom line, but like, but seriously tho how is he that bad at writing female characters, canon is dead, esp naruto, for legal reasons that is a joke, from his teammates that they'll help him kill his only remaining relative, giving our resident dogman teaching tips, he entered the theatre, he has impeccable fashion taste for some reasom, he's kinda neat ngl, hello everybody! it's me ! sendshiversdownyourspine on the iPhone 4s!, his cold body is cooling next to kishimoto's, i hated how kishi portrayed tenten in the shiw, i have not watched anything past ep 161 on naruto and i do not care to watch more, i killed him myself, i made up some backstory for her and lee, i will simply kill for lee, idk how to spell that word, in this house we stan tenten, is that a Jojo reference, isnt she supposes to b a weapons specialist, it adds spice to the story, it is 3am and i typed this in 30 minutes on the notes of me phone, ive seen enough, lee/sakura is the hill i will be dying on pls and ty, like hunny, love the dude tho, my mans entered the chat, naruto being a dumbass, no beta we die like men, now just get over that guilt complex, only temporarily, post wave arc, romantic platonic ill take anything, s, sakura being a dumbass, sakura stans come get yall juice, sasuke receives a singular verbal confirmation, she amde onw move against temari in the chuunin exams and then folded, team 7 bonds over murder, the fandom wiki isn't helping, they're civilian merchants here tho, theyre bffs dont @ me, theyre both dumbasses, this fic is mostly me pissing on kakashi, to finally clearly see all the bullshit kishimoto has slapped onto canon, u can pry that hc from my cold dead hands, wait shit i need to actually tag thi, wheres the spice, y'all are Sakura's parents merchants or shinobi, yayy, yes i am a bad writer yes i will be posting this
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-31
Updated: 2020-12-07
Packaged: 2021-03-06 08:02:08
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 18
Words: 35,369
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25620076
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Sakura looks at the boy in front of her, bold and loud and unashamed, looked at his weirdly cut hair and bushy eyebrows, and goes on a date with him.or, sakura's rejection of lee in canon doesn't make sense because she was literally bullied for her looks and the author is mad.
Relationships: Haruno Sakura & Uchiha Sasuke & Uzumaki Naruto, Haruno Sakura/Rock Lee, Other Relationship Tags to Be Added, Rock Lee & Tenten, Umino Iruka & Uzumaki Naruto
Comments: 969
Kudos: 1286
Collections: oc self insertSI





	1. chapter one

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [I am the BEST Trophy Wife!](https://archiveofourown.org/works/8755378) by [fenrirsteeth (Tetramorph)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tetramorph/pseuds/fenrirsteeth). 



> hello everyone!! this is my first naruto fic and i hope u guys enjoy it!! title is from the song strawberry blond by mitski.

It started like this : team 7 had just finished all of their D-ranks for the day and spent the rest of the afternoon training. Of course "training" here just means that Sasuke and Naruto yell at each other and spar for 4 hours straight while Kakashi sits back and reads his little orange book and Sakura cheers Sasuke on. 

And you know, Sakura doesn't particularly  mind  that none of the boys think to ask her to spar, really, her dress is too cute to ruin anyways and besides, it's so much better to just watch Sasuke-kun beat Naruto up!

Yeah. 

Sakura shakes her head and cheers again as Sasuke-kun delivers a rather nasty uppercut to Naruto, but the blond just gets back up and throws himself at Sasuke-kun as if he wasn't hit in the first place. 

And Sakura wasn't envious, she really wasn't, that would be absurd. Who would be envious of the deadlast anyways? It's not as if the boys hesitate during their spars because they know she can't take a hit, or that between the three of them she's the slowest, clumsiest, and the one with the least stamina. She couldn't really do anything to improve that anyways, not with her incompetent excuse of a jounin sensei who hadn't so much as glanced at her way since the disaster that was Wave. It was fine. 

Sakura shook her head before she went back down to that trail of thought and forced a ditzy smile on just as Naruto managed to trip Sasuke-kun into a pile of mud. Sasuke came up sputtering and Sakura couldn't hold back the giggle at the sight of him; he looked like a drowned cat compared to his usual cool appearance. She slapped a hand over her mouth, mortified of the idea of laughing at her crush, but luckily nobody seemed to notice.

~~ _(Would she call it luck if her own teammates didn't even glance in her direction)_ ~~

Sasuke launched himself at Naruto with a battle cry (he sounded too much like a strangled cat to be threatening, really,  a treacherous part of Sakura drawled) which instigated a full blown mud fight between the boys. Sakura knew that at this point no actual training would be achieved (and it's not like she was actually doing anything) and stood up, brushing nonexistent dirt off her skirt and smiled primly at Kakashi-sensei before picking up her bag and walking towards the exit of the training grounds. She unsuccessfully tried to make Sasuke-kun acknowledge her as she enthusiastically waved at him while expertly dodging Naruto and his date requests. 

Sakura left the training grounds andthe two boys training together like any other day and started her way home. Just another day with team 7. It's not as if Sakura noticed her lack of improvement, but who was she to doubt Kakashi-sensei, he was the jounin sensei here, not her. 

Sakura sighed again and started her trek home, wondering if she actually had a place in team 7, before a green blur slammed right into her and knocked her off her feet. 

Sakura squawked in surprise as she rolled on the ground and quickly sprung to her feet, fully intending to give whoever ungracefully body slammed her a thorough tongue lashing. But before she could open her mouth she was bombarded with a flurry of green spandex and shining hair. 

"MY BLOOMING FLOWER OF YOUTH I SINCERELY APOLOGIZE FOR MY LACK OF GRACE!!", The boy - and he was clearly around her age -then bowed hastily with his hands clasped in front of him. 

Sakura blinked at the strange boy in front of her - and strange he was with his eccentric green spandex and bowl cut and bushy eyebrows- before hesitantly replying. 

"Erm, it's fine really, I wasn't looking where i was going so it's kinda my fault," And it was wasn't it? If she hadn't been brooding so much she would've noticed him, really she should pay more attention to her surroundings Sasuke-kun would never pay attention to her if she's that bad of a kunoichi. 

The boy continued his apologies, unaware of her inner turmoil, "I am Rock Lee!! The Blue Devil of Konoha!! I must apologize again!! For I have just mastered a new taijutsu move and have been overwhelmed with the powerful Force of Youth!! And who are you, Beautiful Flower of Spring?!"

Sakura giggled slightly at the oddity of the boy - Lee - before answering, "I'm Haruno Sakura. It's nice to meet you Lee, even though we both almost got squished into the pavement," 

Lee struck another pose and grinned brightly at her, and if she wasn't already accustomed to Naruto's mega watt smile she might've been blinded. 

"Sakura-chan!! A beautiful name to match a beautiful soul!! Would you like to go on a date with me!! I swear I will protect you until my death!!"

Sakura blanched at that, and was about to reject him, about to call his hair too weird and his eyebrows too bushy, but paused before she could form the words. Yes, her one and true love was Sasuke-kun but it didn't hurt to have experience, and besides, Ino-pig still didn't have her first kiss or boyfriend yet and there's no way Sakura is going to let her beat her! Besides, Lee was kind of cute if you squint and imagine him in anything but spandex. 

(and she remembered, before Sasuke-kun, before Ino-pig, she was just a shy kid with a too large forehead and she'll be damned before she makes fun of another person for their looks)

"I don't know about the protecting part but you seem like a very nice person," Lee deflated at that, already imagining a rejection, but quickly sprung up again as Sakura raises her hand to continue, " and I'd like to go on a date with you to know you better," 

Lee slightly faltered in surprise, clearly not expecting her to agree, before jumping ecstatically and threw his arms around her in a crushing hug. Sakura wheezed in his tight grip before being abruptly let go by a stammering, blushing Lee. Sakura smiled at him before gathering her bag again. 

" You said something about a taijutsu move?" 

It started like this : Haruno Sakura had just finished another day of grueling D-ranks where she did most of the work as Sasuke-kun and Naruto squabbled, then useless training with an incompetent sensei and two annoying boys. She was lonely, tired , and sweaty and yet a random boy declared her to be beautiful. 

She accepted to go on a date with him, and that might have just changed everything. 


	2. chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AAAAAAAH THE SECOND CHAPTER IS ALREADY HERE!!!! this chapter literally jumped out of my brain and spilled itself across my screen. i hope yall enjoy it!!

"- and then Tenten and Neji helped me get to the hospital but I wasn't ready to give up yet! I was determined to master the move no matter what!! But I had to -" 

Sakura listened intently as Lee recalled one his many tales about his training mishaps, wincing slightly as he regaled the tale of yet another injury but brightened as Lee excitedly described how he managed to figure out his mistake which lead to the mastery of the particularly tricky move. They had been talking for over an hour now, initially to hash out the details of their date but now simply getting to know each other. She had been slightly surprised to know he was older than her by a year, but it explained why she didn't notice him in the academy. 

Sakura had been the one to plan most of the date as Lee hadn't objected much, he was still slightly dazed that she actually accepted the date. The plan was for Lee to pick her up from her home after they both finished their training to go to a dango shop Sakura often frequented. Sakura had intended to make further plans for the rest of the day but had been distracted by Lee happily telling her all about his genin team. 

His unit was compromised of two other genins; a kunoichi by the name of Tenten and a Hyuuga shinobi called Neji. Their jounin sensei was Maito Gai and Leeadmired him greatly and talked fondly of his teammates. 

Sakura knew she was being irrational but couldn't quite quell her envy at the clear trust and fondness Lee had for his team. It wasn't fair that her team didn't have that. It wasn't fair that Sakura couldn't muster the same respect towards Kakashi-sensei or the fondness towards her teammates. Sure, her sensei was an admirable shinobi and Sasuke-kun was super cool and cute and they were destined to be together, even Naruto had his moments, but they never went out to eat dinner together like Lee's team did, and didn't have the easy trust Lee put into his team. It made Sakura feel hollow and sad, but she shook those feelings away and focused on the bright boy in front of her. 

The topic derailed again as they began discussing their team training, and Sakura had been a little bit more than shocked at how involved his sensei seemed to be. Kakashi-sensei was always late and didn't do more than randomly throw kunai at them as "reflex training" and punting them against each other (Sasuke and Naruto more than her but she isn't going to think about that) and then going back to read his porn. But Lee's sensei met up with all of them everyday, trained with them, corrected their forms, and even outsourced other people to help with their own specialization! 

Sakura had offhandedly remarked that his sensei sounded like a really cool guy while she desperately tried to reel in her bitterness and envy before Lee noticed, but was slightly surprised at the outburst that followed after. 

"Of course!!! Gai-sensei is one of the most hardworking shinobi I've ever seen!! The Power of Youth he possesses is inspiring!! He believed in me even thought I have an obvious disadvantage compared to my peers and I am forever grateful!!" 

Lee struck another one of his poses and Sakura hid her smile behind her hand; he really was growing on her. She was slightly confused at the disadvantage he talked about and mentioned as such.

Lee's expression darkened slightly and Sakura berated herself for bringing up an obviously sore subject. She opened her mouth to apologize but was beaten by Lee as he quickly smoothed over his expression and sported his usual cheery smile. 

"I can't mold chakra," came the blunt reply and Sakura almost tripped as she stared, wide-eyed, unable to formulate a response," I almost didn't graduate from the academy. None of the teachers thought I could do it. But Gai-sensei did," At the mention of his sensei Lee's smile became a little more sincere. "He believed I could do it and I couldn't be more thankful for his belief in me," 

Sakura stared again, wide-eyed, at the determined boy in front of her and felt a fire bloom within her. Not fierce, or bright, but it was there. She carefully chose her words and, before she could chicken out, grabbed Lee's hand and squeezed it tightly. Lee turned red at the casual touch and then burned even brighter under her hard stare. 

"I'm not a good shinobi," Sakura confessed, and it felt - freeing in a sense, that she was finally able to admit her uselessness. She continued quickly when she saw Lee opening his mouth, to object probably, but she cut him off before he could get the chance, " It's true, y'know, I always cry, I'm too slow, too clumsy, too low on stamina. I always lose at spars and my teammates go soft on me because they know I can't handle it. Even my sensei doesn't take me seriously," 

At this point Sakura started to tear up and she hated that. Hated that tears came easy to her and she couldn't do anything to stop them. But she accepted Lee's wordlessly offered handkerchief and blew her nose noisily and continued,"I'm not a good shinobi, but I will be. We'll both be the best shinobi we can. Even if I'm useless and you can't mold chakra. We'll both be great." 

Lee stared at her for a second before a wide smile split his face. He grabbed both of her hands - still carrying the snotty handkerchief -and clasped them into his hands. "SAKURA-CHAN !!! THE POWER OF YOUTH BURNS BRIGHTLY WITHIN YOU!! I WILL DO ANYTHING IN MY POWER TO ACHIEVE OUR GOALS!! YOSH!! AS CELEBRATION I WILL RUN 30 LAPS AROUND THE VILLAGE!!" 

Sakura blinked in surprise as Lee quickly took off in a sprint, yelling something about youth and love, before shaking her head and following after him to the exit of the training grounds. Boys were so silly, she thought, shaking her head fondly. She stopped abruptly though, head turned towards the direction Lee had run off to. 

Maybe it was time for her to be silly as well. 

She ran after Lee, the wind shrieking in her ears as she pushed herself to match his ridiculous pace and savored the shocked look at his face as she surpassed him, only to be completely left in the dust as he quickly overtook her and doubled his speed. Sakura gaped at him before quickly composing herself. She might not be a stamina freak like Naruto, or as quick as Sasuke-kun, but she was stubborn and that would have to be enough for now. 

Sakura spent the rest of her evening making quite a scene for the citizens of Konoha; a bright pink haired skinny kid chasing after a green blur, both laughing loud enough to disturb the civilians and draw the attention of nearby shinobi. 

Sakura didn't care though; for the first time in weeks she felt the happiest she could. It didn't matter that she practically collapsed during the second lap and had to lower the pace for Lee and her to something she can manage, she'll just run again and again and again until she can run 50 laps without breaking into sweat, and when she'd told Lee as much he grinned bright enough to rival the sun. 

Sakura went back home, sweaty and tired but no longer lonely and a smile so wide on her face that her parents didn't even question why she had come home so late. She went home with plans to run around the village as fast as she could with a boy she had just met and a date. She was going to be great. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> notes about this chapter:  
> \- sakura may seem kinda ooc in this fic and this is because she *oh my god* has other purpose than being a love interest and has her own thoughts, dreams, and insecurities.  
> \- it may come off as mean that sakura isn't that romantically interest in lee but she isnt with sasuke anyways its basically infatuation and theyre 12 they're all dumb and mean  
> \- it greatly infuriates me that we dont have any scenes of team 7 training other than the half assed tree walking bullshit in wave where kakashi uses sakura's success as a way to motivate the boys and then doesnt spare sakura another glance like bitch she just tree walked on her first try give her a pat or something  
> -lee and sakura bonding over their personal shortcomings? more likely than u think  
> -i wanted to make this chapter completely about the date but the conversation just wrote itself and i was listening to harry styles while typing it out so the vibes just carried me


	3. chapter three

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> third chapter is here and boy oh boy do i hate her. me? getting sidetracked for no good reason bc im writing this at 4 am ? more likely than you think. im just hoping the slow pacing makes sakura and lee's relationship feel more genuine. hope yall enjoy this one

Sakura woke up with a start, eyes darting maniacally around her room before landing on her alarm. She sagged in relief when she noticed she still had 20 minutes before she actually had to wake up and silently slid off her bed and padded towards her bathroom. 

When Lee told her he woke up every day at 4:30 to run around the village she was impressed by his determination. She had agreed to join him and set her alarm to 4am, but it seems her own excitement was enough to wake her up, even though a small part of her moaned at the prospect of waking before sunrise.

Sakura squashed down that wailing part of her as she furiously tugged her hair into a braid and tied her hitai-ate to hold back her bangs, then brushed her teeth. Her conversation with Lee yesterday had inspired her and drove her towards higher goals, but she also wanted to punch herself for not applying herself until now. Years spent at the academy were wasted and felt like a slap to Lee's face when he couldn't even mold chakra. Really, what was she doing; slacking off her ninjitsu practice while Lee poured blood and sweat into becoming a shinobi. Sakura huffed angrily yet silently, as she packed her bag, she had wasted so much time in the academy giggling with Ino-pig over Sasuke-kun when she could've been training. 

Sakura faltered slightly at the thought of her long time crush; yes she was still in love with him and yeah, she kind of only wanted to date Lee to have experience and lord it over Ino-pig but now it's different. Now she had a shared goal with Lee and was determined to achieve it, and if it means locking away her emotions from her precious Sasuke-kun then so be it. Besides, she was spoken for now,she can't have a crush on Sasuke-kun, at least not outwardly. 

Sakura finished dressing and packing, having abandoned her red dress for now and swapping it for a pair of pants that went slightly past her knees and needed to be held down at their frayed ends with bandages, and an elbow length yellow shirt with the Haruno clan symbol etched in the back. Her dress had been ruined yesterday from all the running and Sakura knew better than testing her mother's wrath by showing up again with another ruined dress. 

Sakura glanced at the alarm again. 4am. Enough time to prepare breakfast for herself and a bento for both her and Lee. Sakura silently made her way downstairs and began to prepare a hearty breakfast. She usually would've been appalled by the amount of food she was preparing to eat, but she only dieted because Sasuke-kun liked skinny girls and she wasn't dating Sasuke-kun, or at least not trying to. Besides, the yesterday run had thoroughly exhausted her and she had come home hungry enough to eat for 3 people. She served herself breakfast and ate quietly as she listened to the birds chirp outside. When she finished, she carefully washed all the plates and began preparing the bento boxes.

She snuck one last glance at the clock - 4:20 - and packed the finished bentos into her bag. She scrawled down a quick note for her parents and left her house in search of her new jogging partner. 

Sakura eased herself into a light jog as she ran through a mental checklist of what she intended to do for the day. Jog with Lee. Then D-ranks with team 7. Then training. Then date with Lee. 

Sakura smiled slightly as she thought about how awesome their date was going to be before shaking her head and going back to her checklist. 

After date go back home. Eat. Go to the library. Check for genjutsu scrolls. 

Sakura slowed her pace as she rounded around the corner, grinning as she tried to spot Lee to tell him of her new plan to help him become the best shinobi he can, because even if she was useless, Lee was obviously going to be something great. 

It was a good idea, if simple; Sakura had already been pegged as a genjutsu type and Lee can't mold chakra but can circulate it to tree walk and water walk. Sakura felt giddy again as she remembered Lee's heartfelt promise to teach her how to water walk before going back to her plan. She would practice her genjutsu and hone her own abilities as Lee gained more experience in flaring his chakra and breaking out of genjutsu. 

Sakura was slightly winded by the time she met up with Lee and cursed her pathetically low stamina. 

"Sakura-chan!! You're here!!" 

Lee was basically bouncing with glee as she approached him and she looked bemusedly at him as they both started their stretches. 

"Of course! Why wouldn't I come?" 

Lee faltered slightly, half way through his leg stretches,"Ah, it's nothing to concern you! I just had reached out to other of my peers to join me in this youthful exercise but it seems they had not been as enthusiastic at the idea, but no matter! You are here now and we shall joyfully reclaim the springtime of youth!! Yosh!!" 

Sakura watched as Lee dropped into his next set of stretches, unfamiliar to her, and tried as best as she can to copy his movements. It had never occurred to her that Lee had been bullied for excitable personality but now she wanted to hunt down every single person who had ever made fun of him and give them a slow, painful death. 

Is this what Ino felt like, Sakura wondered as she and Lee began their run. She really ought to thank her for not just snapping and committing homocide. 

Sakura snuck a look towards Lee and smiled as she met his eyes. He blushed slightly and grinned back at her before turning back to the road in front of them. She really was going to enjoy this jog. 

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

She was wrong. Oh so wrong. 

Sakura panted from her place on the ground, sweaty and tired. Her whole body ached and muscles she wasn't even aware she had were sore. Her bruises had bruises from where she kept stumbling on the unorthodox paths Lee had led them through as they trekked through Konoha. Above her, Lee was shouting encouragements over the bustling sounds of civilians; the sun having risen hours ago. 

Sakura peeled herself off the ground with a groan and dragged herself towards Lee before urging her screaming muscles to move, work again please just one more time. Lee exclaimed happily as she rejoined him and joyfully jogged next to her, but in a laughably slow pace compared to what they had started off with. 

When Lee invited her to run with him in the mornings she had expected a light jog through the village as they both chatted and enjoyed the scenery. 

Again, she was wrong. Sakura had grasped from their conversation yesterday that Lee was hardworking, but it didn't really hit her until she tried to match his pace while running. At first it was a bit difficult, and Sakura had her doubts that Lee was already slowing himself down for her sake, but manageable. But then they kept going and going and Sakura had been too prideful to ask for a break - cause of her downfall, really - and ended up internalizing her fatigue for nearly a whole hour as Lee chattered beside her. She had collapsed, inevitably, and it was kinda embarrassing but Lee assured her that she doing pretty well for her first time. 

The thing is, Sakura didn't want to do just "pretty well" she wanted to be good. Lee grinned when she politely but firmly refused his offer of stopping for now and exclaimed something about the springtime of youth. 

Of course, a burning urge to be better didn't actually make things better and she ended up crashing into at least 4 vending carts and had to outrun no more than 5 angered salesmen and duck under their heavy assault of tomatoes and onigiri. Lee had then slightly escalated the situation when he tripped into a civilian woman holding a crate full of ink when he tried to simultaneously stifle his laughter and help her escape the wrath of the salesman which ended up in both fo them getting drenched in ink. 

Now, nearly two hours later, Sakura was ready to take everything she said back and crawl into her bed and never come out. But one look at Lee, barely sweating and only slightly out of breath, sent her right back into her original mindset and fueled her with determination. 

They came to a stop eventually, somewhere around 8am, and settled down next to some trees at the top of the Hokage monument. 

"Sakura-chan!! My dear flowering blossom!! Your determination and passion was greatly inspiring!! I hope to be able to have this wonderful experience with you once again!!" 

Sakura blushed under Lee's heavy praise and hopeful expression, and then snorted loudly when she remembered the screams of the red faced civilians they had run by. "I'll definitely look forwards to doing this again but I don't think we should run through the civilian sector anymore." 

"I don't know Sakura-chan, Tadashi-san looked rather dashing in his tomato attire." 

Sakura gaped slightly at Lee before dissolving into a fit of giggles which quickly turned into loud ugly laughter when Lee joined in. They both took a moment to calm down but kept glancing at each other and breaking down into more peals of laughter. It took 10 minutes for them to calm down and Sakura could feel her cheeks stinging from how widely she was grinning. 

Her stomach growled loudly right then and Sakura glowed red as Lee tried to smother his giggles. She shot a glare at him which only made him laugh louder. 

"Well if you're gonna keep laughing at me I guess I won't be able to give you this carefully crafted bento I made," Sakura sniffed daintily. 

Lee wisely quieted down and practically glowed when she handed him his bento. He then opened it with such a reverence Sakura was honestly questioning if he ever had a bento before. 

" I don't have parents," Lee mentioned offhandedly as he took the offered chopsticks from her. Sakura almost slipped from where she was sitting; what is it with this boy and random decelerations that made her want to bash her head in for her lack of tact. "They died when I was born and I've been in the orphanage ever since. The only other person to make me a bento was Tenten, since she was with me. So, thank you," 

Sakura didn't know if she wanted to cry or hug him, but she settled for a soft smile as both of them started eating. They ate in relative silence, watching the citizens of Konoha beginning to wake. 

She was suddenly reminded of her teammates. Of Naruto, with his empty apartment and strewn ramen cups. Of Sasuke-kun and his home, filled with ghosts. She felt grossremembering all the mean stuff she said about Naruto and how lucky he was to not have parents. She'll do better, she vowed, she'll be the best teammate ever. 

When they finished Sakura silently took the bento from Lee and followed him down the mountain. They shared an easy silence only broken by Sakura as they neared her house. 

"Thanks for the run, Lee. I'll see you today at our date," and then she quickly pecked his cheeked and skipped home, graciously ignoring his sputtering and stammering as she rounded the corner. She waved at him one more time before determinedly making her way home. Time to make some bentos. 

She never did get to tell him about her genjustu idea. Oh well, she'll just tell him on their date. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> well what did yall think!?? i want sakura to slowly form into a better person while still retaining her original character; bold, loud, and empathetic


	4. chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i stg im writing everything except for the actual fucking date but i just get carried away!!! writing family dynamics r always fun and while i intended to give sakura's parents a light role they ended up having a whole entire chapter. theres also still so much to write b4 we reach the date!!! ino/sakura confrontation!! team 7 reaction!!! team gai reaction!! if u guys feel the pacing is a bit too slow just tell me !!

Mebuki stared at her daughter quizzically as she cheerfully butchered her way through her kitchen. Pots and pans were strewn everywhere, the rice cooker was beeping loudly, and dozens of vegetables were thrown hazardously on the kitchen counter. 

When her cute little daughter left a note saying that she was out jogging with a boy and she would be back in a couple of hours, Mebuki had shared a look with her husband but quietly decided to trust Sakura. But when she cane back home filthy, sweaty, covered in tomatoes and ink, Mebuki and Kizashi were a little concerned and yet continued to put their faith in their little blossom. 

She was slightly surprised when Sakura flounced downstairs not dressed in her regular red dress that she usually favored, but rather a pair of pants similar to the ones she came back home in and a light pink, elbow length shirt, but was even more startled when she announced that she was preparing bentos for her teammates. Sasuke she understood; her daughter had been crushing on him since she entered the academy and Mebuki and Kizashi had spent years cooing at her attempts to get him to notice her, but Sakura had never been fond of her other teammate.

Mebuki casually tried to ask her what caused the change of heart that she didn't quite support and was shocked at the outburst from her only daughter. 

"Ka-san! Naruto is an orphan and he's been alone since he was a kid! And Sasuke-ku -," here Sakura had cut off rather abruptly before clearing her throat and continuing," Sasuke had lost his clan! They probably both hadn't had bentos in ages!" 

Mebuki raised an eyebrow at the dropping of the honorific and shared yet another look with her husband who had remained silent throughout the whole interaction, _her husband really wasn't a morning person_ , she mused fondly, but grimaced slightly at the thought of Uzumaki Naruto. She had been horrified when her daughter had been placed in the same team as that brat but quickly smoothed over her expression before her daughter noticed. She really couldn't handle another outburst so early in the morning. 

Before she could another word in to try and understand her daughter's sudden change of heart, Sakura spun suddenly to face her parents, a serious look on her face. 

"I'm going on a date," was all she had offered before spinning around again and turning back to her almost ready bentos. 

Mebuki raised her eyes towards the ceiling as she tried to quell the quickly approaching headache as her suddenly awakened husband began sputtering and almost met his fate as he choked on his coffee. Sakura, taking advantage of the distraction, quickly shoved the now complete bentos in her bag and attempted to sprint out the kitchen, thumping her father once on the back. 

Kizashi all but lunged towards his daughter, probably intending on grabbing her and hiding her in his room for the rest of the day. Sakura ducked underneath his swiping hands and laughed breathlesslyas she opened the door and shoved her sandals on. Mebuki calmly stepped over his sprawled figure on the floor and grabbed Sakura's weapons pouch she had forgotten in her haste, locked the door behind her as she exited the house and patiently waited for her daughter at the doorsteps of their home. 

Sakura came back sprinting and sheepishly accepted the weapons pouch under her mother's unimpressed gaze. 

"So, have you finally managed to wrangle a date out of Sasuke?" Mebuki watched fondly as her daughter blushed and sputtered for a solid minute before composing herself. 

"No! I'm going out with another person! Besides I don't like Sasuke like that anymore!" Sakura huffed and crossed her arms, but her blush completely gave her away. 

"Oh? Then who is it? Maybe Ino-chan?" Mebuki mused out loud, enjoying the sight of her daughter crumbling again and being reduced to a blushing mess. 

"NO!! Ka-san you know I don't like Ino-pig like that! Besides, we're rivals!" 

Mebuki laid a hand on her daughter's shoulder, "Really? But I thought you didn't like Sasuke anymore? Why would you be rivals anymore?" 

Sakura floundered for a second and Mebuki silently did a happy little dance in her head. She had known her daughter was insecure and felt overshadowed by Ino, but she didn't think she would go as far as throw away their friendship and replace it with a rivalry under the flimsy guise of having a crush on the same boy. She remembered how sad her daughter was when she returned her ribbon to Ino, but now after graduating and becoming genin Mebuki had hopes for her daughter to rekindle her friendship. 

"No, I still want to be rivals with Ino-pig; it's fun.", Sakura admitted with a flush, "Now we'll just be rivals to be the best kunoichi we can!" Sakura then struck a weird but adorable pose and Mebuki couldn't contain her giggle. 

"Well then, do as you please. But don't think I haven't forgotten about this date you were talking about. Now, who's this boy that managed to capture my cute daughter's heart?" 

Sakura blushed down to the roots of her hair and tried to run away, but Mebuki had a firm grasp on her shoulder. She eventually gave up her struggles and sighed dramatically as she sat down. Mebuki went to follow her but turned around to open the door. Sakura squinted at her but then squawked as her father fell through from where he was leaning on the door, obviously eavesdropping. 

"Tou-san!" Sakura cried embarrassedly as Kizashi sat up with a laugh and motioned for Mebuki to sit next to him. 

"Well, my cute little blossom? Tell us all about this young man!" 

Mebuki watched as her daughter shifted slightly before leaning into her father's side and did the same, gazing towards the rustling leaves of the trees in front of their house. 

"His name is Lee," Sakura muttered as she pushed her fingers together, " We met after training - well, he slammed into me and then asked me out." 

Mebuki let out an unladylike snort at that as Kizashi roared with laughter, but she elbowed him slightly as Sakura blushed again and motioned for her to continue. 

Sakura glared at her still snickering father and went on, "I said yes and we started talking and then I found out he couldn't mold chakra and I was really sad for him but then I was super impressed because he was really good at taijutsu! Like, really good! And then he invited me to jog with him - that's why I was out this morning - and he was just so fast! I couldn't keep up with him and he had to slow the pace for me. And then we went through the civilian and kinda bumped into a lot of people? Oh, by the way, you might not want to shop as Tadashi-san for a while." 

Kizashi laughed again and Sakura smiled sheepishly at him before going on. 

"And then we went to the mountain at the top of the Hokage monument and had breakfast together and then it turned out that Lee was an orphan too and he was so happy when I gave him a bento!" 

Ah, so that's where her daughter's sudden motivation had come from. Mebuki couldn't help but feel the warm tingles of pride rush through her; her daughter was growing up to be a kind woman and she couldn't ask for anything else. 

Sakura flushed as she finished her word vomit and took a moment to catch her breath before lifting her gaze again and meeting her parents eyes'. Mebuki was slightly taken aback at the fierce determination shining in her daughter's eyes. 

"I'm gonna be a great shinobi," Sakura vowed, "You just wait, I'll have my name in the Bingo Book and stand right next to Lee when we grow up," 

Kizashi and Mebuki shared a brief look before embracing their daughter, "And we don't doubt for a second sweetie," Their daughter was growing up. 

Sakura smiled broadly at her parents and hugged them tightly. Then she shot up suddenly and made her way down the path and towards the street. 

"I forgot about team 7's D-ranks!!" Sakura yelled anxiously. Kizashi roared hysterically at their pink daughter and made his way inside the house. Mebuki rose as well and brushed the dirt from her dress. 

"Sakura, dear, don't forget to tell Ino-chan about your rivalry!" 

Sakura hollered something that sounded like an affirmation and Mebuki shook her head fondly. Their daughter was growing up, yes, but she still had a long way to go, and Mebuki was going to savor every last second of it. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i love family dynamics and as the only resident member of team 7 with a whole set of parents sakura is gonna have them be functional goddamnit. inspiration only strikes me at 3-4 am and im the only irl person in my life who knows im writing this so if there r any spelling mistakes or anything else dont be shy to correct me!!


	5. chapter five

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the way that i typed this in two hours and it's currently 5am

Sakura jumped off the ledge of another building and raced across the rooftops, the wind blowing her long hair back as she leapt from building to building. 

She had been originally looking for Ino-pig to challenge her to be rivals of skill rather than love, but after dashing around for nearly 30 minutes and seeing no sign of the blonde she had been almost ready to give up entirely and just head towards team 7's regular meeting place at the bridge. 

That's when she noticed the shinobi running along the rooftops and thought, _hey, I can do that_. At first she had been a bit hesitant as she peered over the high ledges, but after a few practice jumps and a little chakra to firmly keep her from flying off, Sakura was gracefully leaping across the rooftops. 

_Cha! I'm doing it just like Kakashi-sensei_ , Sakura had thought giddily, _I bet Sasuke doesn't even know how to do this_. 

Sakura shook her head at that thought and scowled a bit as she stopped and leaned over a balcony she was temporarily borrowing, scanning the streets for any traces of platinum blond. Don't get ahead of yourself, she scolded slightly, Sasuke was Top Rookie for a reason. 

Still, she mused, Sasuke never really willingly walked through the streets so he probably wasn't that familiar with the layout. 

Sakura's inner debate was cut short as she caught a glimpse of a familiar slouch; Shikamaru! 

And where Shikamaru went the rest of the Ino-Shika-Cho were sure to follow so that means - aha! There! 

Sakura launched herself off the balcony and sprinted across the restaurant walls, body parallel to the ground and held tightly to the walls with the use of chakra. She released the flow of chakra as she neared her rival and used the wall as a launch board to land right at Ino's feet. 

Sakura rolled to her feet and spun around to face her rival, finger pointed accusingly, " Ino-pig!" 

Ino had settled into a fighting stance at her arrival but dropped it as she took in the sight of her. She gasped dramatically and pointed her own finger, "Billboard Brow! What are doing here? Sasuke-kun finally got sick of you?" 

Sakura ignored her taunts and batted her finger away, marching up to Ino, "Of course not! Besides, I don't care about Sasuke anymore, in fact, I don't even wanna date him!" She crossed her arms and huffed as Ino stared incredulously at her. 

"What do you mean you don't like him anymore? What's the point of this anyways?" Ino looked around suspiciously, as if a parade would suddenly emerge and embarrass her in some way. 

"I'm glad you asked! You see, I don't want to be love rivals anymore!" 

Ino gaped at her for a second, hurt flashing across her face for a second but quickly cleared her expression. Sakura noticed though and hurried to continue before she go the wrong idea. 

"I am going to challenge you to be rivals of skill instead! You better watch out Ino-pig, because I'm going to trounce you in the Chuunin Exams!" 

Ino stared at her for a second before smirking and haughtily accepting, "Okay then, I accept! May the best kunoichi win! Oh, and Ugly, you better watch out because I'm going to snatch up your teammate and get a boyfriend before you do!" 

"Ha! Fat chance Ino-pig, like Sasuke would ever sink down to date someone like you!" Sakura sniffed daintily before smiling slyly, "Besides, you can't beat me! I already won, I have a date today!" 

"What?? Who would date you, Billboard Brow? Never mind, I'll be coming over today, you hear me! There's no way I'll be caught dead being rivals with someone with no fashion sense, fake date or not!" 

"He's not fake, you're just jealous," Sakura stuck out her tongue childishly before turning around and skipping away. "Ka-san's making ramen today! And bring my ribbon with you!" 

She turned her head to flash one last smirk at Ino-pig but almost stumbled as she crashed into her. Sakura instinctively wrapped her arms around her ex-best-friend-turned-love-rival-turned-kunoichi-rival and held her firmly. 

"I missed you, Ugly," Ino confessed wetly into her shoulder. Sakura awkwardly hovered for a second before she felt her throat close up and sniffed loudly, suddenly being hit with years of loneliness after breaking her friendship off. "Me too, Ino-pig. 'M sorry I stopped talking to you," 

Ino laughed and gripped her tightly, "It's fine, it was my fault too." 

The two friends hugged each other for a few more seconds before pulling away, each sporting an identical smile. 

"You better not think that just because we're friends again it means I'll go easy on you!" Sakura laughed at her friend _(Friends!!! They were friends again!!)_ and shook her head. 

"Not a chance Ino-pig!" Sakura then turned and scaled the nearest wall before flipping onto the roof and sprinted across the rooftops. The last thing she heard as she left the clearing was Shikamaru complaining about how troublesome women were and Ino-pig's nagging about needing to train more, while Chouji munched happily on his chips. 

Sakura grinned as she leapt across another building. Making amends with Ino wasn't exactly on her to-do list, but it was the best thing she did in a while; she could feel a heavy weight lift from her chest. 

She arrived at the red bridge her team used as a meeting place with a bright grin and an extra bounce in her step. Sasuke and Naruto were already there but Kakashi-sensei was - unsurprisingly - late, even though it was already 9 o'clock. 

Naruto immediately took notice of her and waved excitedly at her and Sakura, still exhilarated from her roof hopping and encounter with Ino, waved back just as enthusiastically. Naruto almost fell backwards into the lake from his surprise and Sakura had to lunge forward to catch him. 

"Sakura-chan!! You're kinda late today!! But it's okay, dattebayo, Kaka-sensei's late anyways. What's up with the new outfit?? Not that you're not pretty!! You're still pretty, dattebayo!! I like your shirt!! It reminds me of this plant I saw and -" 

Sakura let Naruto ramble on for a but and was suddenly reminded of Lee; he and Naruto were kind of alike now that she thought of it. Although Lee was more polite. And less dumb. Sakura watched as Naruto tried and failed to describe a plant for nearly three minutes. Yep, definitely less dumb. 

"Good morning to you too, Naruto. I hope you slept well," Naruto gaped at her for a second before grinning widely at her. Sakura turned to face Sasuke and greeted him as well, then she pulled out a book on genjutsu she had owned but never read, and settled down to read. After a couple of seconds she realized both boys were being suspiciously quiet and looked up to see what they were doing. To her surprise they were both gaping at her, Sasuke more so than Naruto. 

"Um, you guys alright?" 

Sasuke seemed to snap out of and leaned suspiciously to peer at her, Sakura flushed at the proximity and looked questioningly at Naruto, but he was just doing the same thing. 

"You haven't asked me out," Came the bland reply from Sasuke. Sakura tore her gaze away from Naruto and blushed even more at his words. Yeah, she knew she was kind of clingy, but to warrant this kind of reaction was just embarrassing. 

"Erm - yeah, I don't want to date you anymore Sasuke. Sorry," Sakura watched as Sasuke leaned away from her in blatant shock, and a hint of relief, while Naruto squawked and fell. She was kind of getting annoyed at their reactions; it wasn't that big of a deal! 

Sasuke huffed before plopping down to sit next to her - _come on girl deep breaths you have a date you don't have crush on him anymore come on_ \- before glancing at her book. 

"What're you reading anyways?" Sasuke grumbled. 

Naruto yelped indignantly, apparently mad he was being left out, and threw himself right next to the unoccupied space next to Sakura. 

"Wait, so we're just gonna ignore Sakura-chan not having a crush on teme anymore??" 

"Shut up, dobe. It's none of your business," 

Sakura snorted at them before picking up her book, "Alright, break it up you two. And to answer your question, Sasuke, this is a book about genjutsu." 

"Genjutsu? Ne, Sakura-chan, what's that?" 

Sakura felt a wave of annoyance crash through her and raised her hand to thump Naruto on his head, "Baka, this is one of the basic concepts we took at the the academy. Really, Naruto how do you not know this?"

Sasuke grunted in approval next to her and it took all of Sakura's willpower not to glow under his acknowledgment. She turned her focus back to Naruto who was still rubbing his head and grumbling. 

"It's not my fault the teachers at the academy suck! Every time I asked for help they just ignored me, dattebayo!" 

Sakura opened her mouth to snap at him again before she processed his words. She closed her mouth and furrowed her eyebrows, "That's not what teachers are supposed to do," 

Sasuke grunted again and Sakura wondered if he was genuinely only able to communicate like a caveman before turning back to Naruto. 

"Well, since nobody explained it to you, genjutsu is one of the forms of manipulating chakra and it's used to make illusions." 

"The sharingan was famous for its genjutsu techniques," Sasuke suddenly offered, and both her and Naruto startled at his voice, " It could easily spot genjutsu and shove victims into their own heads for what seemed like years, but was only a couple of seconds." 

Sasuke had a far away look as he explained his clan kekkai genkai, as if he were experiencing something else as he spoke. Sakura and Naruto shared a look before Sakura cleared her throat. Sasuke seemed to snap out of whatever he was going through and stayed silent. 

"I could read out loud if you guys want," Sakura blurted. Naruto perked up and nodded eagerly while Sasuke looked questioningly at her, "It's not like Kakashi-sensei is coming anytime soon," 

Sasuke seemed to agree with that and nodded at her. Sakura took that as invitation to start, but before she did she suddenly reached into her bag and grabbed three bentos from it. She carefully handed Naruto and Sasuke their own before grabbing her own. Naruto and Sasuke were looking at her in confusion and Sakura quickly explained. 

"Well you guys are always so hungry and I had free time this morning so I thought I could prepare some bentos for you!" 

Naruto clutched his bento to his chest and Sakura was once again reminded of Lee. He choked out a 'thank you' before ducking his head down and gazing reverently at the box.  Sasuke stared intently at his bento, his face a mixture of feelings she couldn't decipher, but before Sakura say anything Sasuke had angrily shoved the bento towards her and moved to get up. 

Sakura yelped in surprise as she fumbled with the bento and snatched Sasuke's hand before he could leave. 

"Hey! Why did you do that! If you already ate you could've just told me!" Sakura huffed but quickly drew back as Sasuke slapped her hand away and stormed up to her face. 

"HEY! TEME! DON'T SLAP SAKURA-CHAN!" 

Sakura resisted the urge to verbally agree with Naruto and hysterically thought, _wow this is the closest I've ever been to Sasuke in a non-life threatening situation._ Well, technically her life was in danger with all the killing intent Sasuke was leaking. Seriously, he could've told her he hated bentos, they could've avoided this whole incident. 

Sakura was snapped out of her thoughts as Sasuke jabbed a finger at her chest, " I don't need to be coddled, especially from a useless shinobi like you. The only reason I'm even on this team is so that Kakashi can teach me how to master the Sharingan. I'm going to kill that manand neither of you are going to stop me!" 

Sasuke's voice had been gradually increasing during his monologue - seriously what was she supposed to call it - and basically bellowed out the last sentence. Coincidentally, Sakura's patience had been slowly decreasing and had just reached its end, especially at the 'useless shinobi' comment.

"Oh my god, Sasuke, nobody's gonna stop you from killing whoever it is you're going after. We're literally shinobi; killing is kinda in the job description." 

Sasuke gaped at her, clearly not expecting that response, but Sakura wasn't finished yet. 

"And if, for some weird reason, somebody tries to stop you, me and Naruto will help you anyways; right Naruto?" Sakura didn't wait for his response before pulling Sasuke down next to her and handing him his bento again, "Now shut up and eat your breakfast,"

Sasuke silently took the offered chopsticks and opened his bento, clearly shocked from her outburst. Naruto, on the other hand, was roaring with laughter and reached over Sakura to noogie Sasuke on the head. 

"Sakura-chan is right, teme! We'll help you dattebayo!" 

Sakura smiled as the boys settled down and cleared her throat again as she flipped back to the first page, "Introduction to Genjutsu: The Art of Illusions," 

Team 7 spent two hours sitting like that, listening to Sakura read. Naruto piped up with a question every line or so and Sakura did her best to answer each one, even the ridiculously stupid ones, and even Sasuke joined in the conversation occasionally. 

By the time Kakashi-sensei had arrived, it was eleven o'clock and Sakura had read through three chapters. Her throat was sore and dry from all the talking and her vision blurred slightly when she looked up from the text, but team 7 had never worked better together during their D-ranks as they had today.

Training went by as it usually did, but every time Sakura was punched or beat down she did her damn best to get back up again. One day, she swore as she took in Naruto's apologetic face and Sasuke's smug one, she's going to wipe the floor with her teammates. 

By the time training was over, Sakura was ready to take a 40 minute shower and just crash. But then she suddenly remembered her date with Lee and sprung up from her place where she was sprawled on the ground. 

"Oi, Sakura-chan, why're you in a hurry??" Naruto gazed at her from where his sweaty figure was laying down while Sasuke propped himself on his elbows. Even Kakashi-sensei put down his book. 

"Well, Naruto, I actually have a date in," Sakura fished for her watch, stuffed somewhere in her bag, " in two hours!! I have to go home or I'll be too late to get ready!"

Sakura frantically gathered her thing into her back, unaware of the chaos occurring behind her back. Naruto, who had rested his face in his hands, slipped and face planted into the ground. Sasuke choked on the water he was drinking and Kakashi fell out of the tree he was perched on. 

" A DATE??? WITH WHO??" 

Sakura swiveled around as she looked for her missing kunai - she could've sworn it was right over the scorch marks from Naruto's exploding tags- and was unceremoniously grabbed by the shoulders and shaken by a frothing Naruto. 

"It's with - Naruto stop shaking me! - a boy named Lee. I met him yesterday and he was really sweet,"

"You met him yesterday? And agreed to go on a date with him? What? Do you even know what he looks like?"

Sakura gaped at Sasuke as he basically interrogated her. Seriously, out of all the people she knew, she didn't expect Sasuke to be the overprotective one. 

"Of course I know what he looks like! He had thick black eyebrows and a bowl cut, and was wearing a green spandex suit!" 

Kakashi-sensei let out a strangled choke at her description and nearly bodied Naruto as he grabbed her out of the blond's grip and began shaking her himself, yelling something about turtles and rivals. 

Sakura was getting quite dizzy from all the shaking and shimmied out of her sensei's grasp and grabbed her bag, planning on booking it and escaping her crazy team. 

Sasuke rather rudely blocked her escape with his arms crossed. " Even if you're going on a date with a creepy weirdo there's no way you're going dressed like that," 

Sakura could quite frankly not believe the sight of her childhood crush judging her style (Workout clothes! They were workout clothes!) and physically felt her brain stop functioning. She heard Naruto in the background yelling something about how ' Sakura-chan always looks pretty, dattebayo, how dare you teme' before deciding to open her big fat mouth. 

"As if you can do any better,"

Naruto stopped his yelling for a second to bust out laughing while Sasuke's eye twitched. 

"Actually, I can. Get up dobe, we're going to make Sakura the prettiest date ever," 

Sakura was dragged out of the training grounds by both her teammates as they left their hysterical sensei in the ground, clutching his head, and thought it wasn't that bad of a way to start off her date preparations. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> heloooo hope u guys enjoyed this one!!! would u guys want a team gai reaction or just stay in sakura's pov? i tried to capture naruto and sasuke's energy here which was a bit hard considering naruto decides to end every single sentence with dattebayo and half of sasuke's dialogue is "tch" anyways fashion icon sasuke rights 2020
> 
> EDIT : I changed some stuff in this chapter because after rereading when i woke up i realized that sasuke's reaction to the bento might be a little ooc since a large portion of his character is literally "i dont need friends they disappoint me" and i feel like this addition would further cement team 7' relationship and segway more smoothly into their interactions later in the chapter and the rest of the fic. again tho #fashioniconsasukeright2k20  
> EDIT: ok i actually just finished editing the chapter and oh my god there were so many spelling mistakes it's embarrassing. i really should stop writing only at 3am


	6. chapter six

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> me : stop writing at only 3 am  
> also me, at 3am : haha fanfic machine go brr
> 
> oh and for those that i havent nagged at in the comment section of the last chapter, i rewrote a section of it bc it felt a bit ooc

Tenten had grown up in the orphanage with Lee ever since they were kids. She played ninja tag with him and the rest of the kids at the orphanage. She entered the academy with him. He was there when she decided to be a weapons' specialist and she was there for him when they discovered he couldn't mold chakra. 

She shared his sorrow and tried to cheer him up, telling him he didn't need chakra to be a good shinobi, and watched helplessly as he overworked himself as he tried to be the best at taijutsu. 

When Gai-sensei had first barged into their lives', she had been skeptical about him. Suspicious at the thought of a grown man taking such an interest in Lee. But all her suspicions were quickly chased away as Lee came back to the orphanage happier at each meetup he had with the odd jounin. 

And yeah, it was a bit concerning when Lee started to obsessively emulate the older man, but he didn't completely wipe off his won personality so Tenten didn't give it much thought. Had she known he would end up wearing that disgusting green spandex, she would've stabbed Gai-sensei years ago and dragged off Lee to save his already shitty fashion sense. 

Still, Lee was happy and that's all she could ask for. Being assigned to Gai-sensei's team was a bit of a surprise, but not an unwelcome one. Tenten had been thrilled that she had been on the same team as Lee, but a bit distraught with her other teammate, Hyuuga Neji. 

God, she had hated that haughty shitbag. Always going off about fate and destiny, Tenten had spent the majority of their academy years resisting the urge to strangle him. 

Of course, it didn't help that Lee took it upon himself to challenge Neji to be his rival. Gai-sensei certainly wasn't of any help, going off about the power of youth while sobbing hysterically. 

But Tenten had kept her mouth shut for Lee. If he enjoyed Neji beating his ass every day during training, then she had no business stopping him from doing so. It was really just a coincidence that Tenten tended to stab harder at Neji whenever he seemed particularly smug about his victory. 

Their initial dynamics as teammates weren't the best, she'll admit to that. But now, nearly a year after, they had grown to like each other. Of course Tenten would always be one of Lee's most avid supporters (she couldn't claim to be his no.1 supporter, not even in the safety of her mind; that position was jealously protected by her own Gai-sensei) but now he and Neji seemed to actually be able to hold a conversation, and Tenten wasn't so quick to stab the Hyuuga whenever he was particularly obnoxious. 

Bottom line was; Tenten would throw away her entire life, her entire career, for Lee. So when he popped one day, smiling and humming under his breath, yelling enthusiastically about his date, Tenten had the sudden urge to grab him and hide him under her bed, just like they used to do when they were kids. 

"What do you mean, a date?" Tenten had asked incredulously. Possibilities raced through her mind; did he get caught under a genjutsu? Was it another mean prank from one of his academy bullies? Tenten had no qualms about running them over now that they had graduated. 

She was snapped out of her thoughts as Neji snorted besides her, clearly sharing her disbelief. Tenten saw Lee deflate a bit at their reactions, but was quickly swept away by their exuberant sensei. Tenten tried to shove down the small silver of guilt; it's not that she thought Lee was undatable, it's just that none of the girls at the academy took notice of him, and he was slightly bullied for his thick eyebrows, and recently, his bowl cut. She sobered slightly at the thought of his hair; they had grown out their hair together, Tenten keeping her's in two strict buns while Lee braided it down. She had mourned irrationally at the day of The Cutting, as she liked to call it. 

Neji snorted again beside her and Tenten winced as she took in the sight of Lee and Gai-sensei; apparently they had moved on from the hugging stage to the inspirational-speech-with-a-slight- gejutsu-applied stage. Tenten watched in fond exasperation as Lee determinedly nodded to whatever weird advise Gai-sensei was handing him, the illusionary waves crashing behind them. 

" - and that's when you seduce them with the burning Power Of Youth!" Gai-sensei struck a pose as Lee cheered and clapped, jotting down everything their sensei had spouted off in a tiny notebook. 

"You seriously can't believe he actually has a date, do you sensei?" Neji sneered. Tenten was yet again hit with the overwhelming urge to smack on the head. Hard. She happily did when she realized there was nothing holding her back from doing so. 

"Shut up, Neji. If Lee says he has a date, then he has a date. Now, Lee, who's this cute girl you managed to seduce?" 

Neji scowled at her as he rubbed his head. Tenten ignored him in favor of listening to Lee ramble about a pink haired girl he had met yesterday and went on a jog with this morning. 

Tenten squinted slightly at Lee as he glosses over the jog; team Gai always met up a little bit early, at 7 am to be precise. 

"Lee, have you been overworking yourself again? What did we say about sleep schedules?" 

Lee paused his ramblings as he sheepishly scratched his neck, but whatever he was planning to say was drowned out by Gai-sensei's booming reprimanding. 

"Tenten-chan is correct! Your body must be taken care of! And since you all are in your prime Spring of Youth, you require at least 8 hours of rest!" 

Tenten sighed as Lee burst into tears at what seemed like the fifth time this morning. She sat down next to Neji, who had settled down as soon as Lee started his ramblings, and motioned for Lee to sit down with them when he finally finished hugging it out with Gai-sensei. 

"So, pinkie with bad stamina?" 

Lee smiled widely as he resumed his ramblings, "Her same is Sakura-chan and she wore a really pretty red dress and had really bright green eyes and didn't make fun of me for not being able to mold chakra and ran around the village with me after accepting to go on a date with me!"

Lee was slightly out of breath as he finished his word vomit, grinning as he rocked on his heels. Neji looked up from where he was tearing up the grass, "Well, she certainly made an impact on you," 

Tenten snorted as Lee went on another tangent about how excited he was for his date, "You can say that again," 

Tenten sneaked a look at her sensei who had been suspiciously quiet throughout the whole interaction - never a good sign - and was surprised to see a devious smirk settle on his face. She was tempted to ask him about it before realizing that she simply didn't care enough to be dragged into his shenanigans, certainly not at this hour. 

Gai-sensei clapped his hands together as he barked at them to start running, shouting something about the Spring of Youth. 

Well, whatever it is that Gai-sensei was planning, it could wait after training. 

Training went as usual; they ran until they couldn't and then ran a bit more, they did a bunch of D-ranks that Lee turned into a competition with Neji, and finally attempted to beat the shit out of each other during sparring. Lee declared that he'll beat Neji today, just like usual, while Neji rolled his eyes and beat him, just like usual. 

Tenten enjoyed sparring with her teammates as it always kept her on her toes. She was good at taijutsu - she had to be with the kind of sensei she had - but nowhere near on the level Lee was at. Her win to lose ratio was kind of leaning heavily to the lose but she didn't go down without a fight. 

Sparring with Neji was fun, if only because she liked seeing him get mad. When they first started off as a team, Tenten had always lost pathetically to Neji, but after a year of getting her ass handed to her she started to see some chips in his armor. Specifically, his blind spot. Of course, knowing her opponent's weakness and being able to exploit it were two different things, especially since Tenten relied on weapons while Neji used the infamous Hyuuga taijutsu style. She also tended to switch her weapons every once in a while. Today it was a war hammer, and she took great pleasure in watching Neji frantically dodge her bruising swings. She lost, predictably, but not before slamming her hammer satisfyingly into Neji's side; not hard enough to break any bones, but it will leave some nasty bruises. 

Team Gai collapsed, exhausted, at the end of their sparring. Gai-sensei had left not long ago, citing some important business he needed to get to. Tenten huffed as she clumsily tried to bat away the hair falling into her eyes, her buns had fallen off sometime during her spar with Neji. 

"Hey Lee, when's your date anyway?" 

Tenten propped herself up on her elbows as she waited for him to catch his breath. 

"It's in two hours, I believe," 

Tenten whipped her head around to face Lee, " Two hours?? That's barely enough time to get you ready!! Up, up! We're going to get you date-ready in no time! Don't look at me like that! Knowing you, you'll probably show up wearing your spandex!" 

Tenten hauled Lee off the ground and made her way towards the exit, but stopped as Neji's drawl reached her ears. 

"You? Get him date-ready? Don't make me laugh," 

Tenten narrowed her eyes at the haughty boy in front of her, " Oh? Lee do you hear anything, because I thought the bitch that wears kaki shorts all year round said something," 

Lee coughed beside her as he tried to smother his laughter while Neji jumped indignantly to his feet, "As if you can do any better, Mickey Mouse," 

Lee was starting to sound like a strangling cat as he really tried hard not to laugh. Tenten touched her buns, affronted, before darting forwards and interlocking Neji's arm with her's. 

"Guess we have to work together then!" 

Neji sputtered as she dragged the two boys out of the training grounds, making excuses and complaining but not genuinely trying to escape from her grasp. 

Tenten had been there for Lee almost their entire lives', and she isn't going to change that now. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i wanted to include team gai's makeover montage in this chapter as well but felt it would be better if i made a singular stand alone chapter for both team seven and team gai preparations. 
> 
> also me? making up lee and tenten's backstory? its more likely than u think. i also intentionally added more swearing in this chapter bc i feel like tenten is the kind of person to swear a lot. whether mickey mouse exists or not in the naruto universe is none of my concern, ive made my joke and thats enough for me


	7. chapter seven

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter seven is here!!! and she's in the pov of our favorite avenger!! writing sasuke's pov was both fun and frustrating bc i tried to capture his dick energy while also convey he is a small tiny 12 year old child. i also believe in ino supremacy

" TEME, STOP DRAGGING ME! YOU CAN'T HANDLE YOUR FUTURE HOKAGE LIKE THIS, 'TTEBAYO!" 

Sasuke winced at the sheer volume Naruto managed to reach, oblivious to the scathing looks villagers sent their way. 

"Well you should work on actually being able to walk if you really want to be Hokage," Sasuke sneered at the blond. He heard Sakura sigh loudly from his other side as he dragged both his teammates across Konoha. 

When he first got assigned to his genin team, he had been furious; paired with the dead last and a useless fangirl? He would never be able to get stronger this way. He was proven right when they met their jounin-sensei and inwardly considered demanding Iruka-sensei for a reassignment. 

The next two weeks spent doing stupid D-ranks grated on his nerves, he was wasting time and could be training to get stronger! At this point he would never catch up to _him_. 

Then Wave happened and Sasuke unlocked his Sharingan and almost died. He loathed to admit it but the dobe actually impressed him with his strategy and unwillingness to give up. He was another person that Sasuke seemed to fall back behind. 

Sasuke gritted his teeth as he rounded another corner, Naruto still complaining loudly while Sakura threatened to punch him through a wall if he doesn't shut up. While Naruto seemed to be improving, Sakura had stayed the same old useless fangirl. Until today it seemed. 

When she declared she no longer had a crush on him, his heart had soared. Will he be finally left alone? But he had squashed that hope, suspecting this to be another ploy to garner his attention. That same hope rekindled when Sakura snapped at him this morning; usually she'd let him walk all over her. 

So when she declared she had a date, Sasuke had jumped to the opportunity to get her off his back, once and for all. He would rather die than admit it, but he had initially been a bit worried, protective, when she claimed she accepted to go on a date with a stranger she had met yesterday, but Sakura seemed to be confident that whoever she was potentially-dating wasn't a weirdo, so Sasuke took her word for it. 

"Sasuke, I hate to agree with Naruto," They both ignored his affronted shout, "but stop dragging us, you don't even know where my house is," Sakura huffed irritably as she tore her arm out of his grip, grumbling something about annoying boys and stupid crushes. 

"Yeah, teme! What Sakura-chan said! Wait, Why're we going to Sakura-chan's house anyways? Are we actually gonna help her dress up for her date? I don't think you should go on that date, Sakura-chan, you don't even know who the guy is, he'll probably kidnap you, dattebayo! You should go on a date with me instead!" 

Sakura shot Naruto a glare while Sasuke sullenly agreed; as much as he wanted Sakura out of his hair, he didn't want her to be kidnapped. 

"For the last time, his name is Lee and he isn't gonna kidnap me! And besides, I've told you several times that I don't want to go on a date with you, Naruto! No means no!" Sakura stomped her foot angrily at her last sentence, the ground cracking under her heel from the force she put behind it. Now if only she applied that strength in their spars, Sasuke mournfully thought. 

Naruto wisely inched away from the heavily breathing Sakura, whose face was turning a fascinating shade of red. 

"Imagine how tired I am," Sasuke muttered under his breath, not expecting anybody to hear him but was surprised at the guilty look that appeared on Sakura's face. Huh, guess he was louder than he thought. 

"Ugh, Sasuke, is this how you felt every time I asked you out? I'm sorry," Sakura shamefully looked at the ruined ground before meeting his gaze, "I'll promise to be a better teammate, you just wait and see! And I'll never ask you out again!"

Sasuke resisted the urge to scream happily into the sky and do a ridiculous dance, and instead offered a rare smile to his teammate, Sakura responded with a wide grin and extended her fist towards him. He raised his own fist and bumped them together. 

Naruto, who had been quiet throughout the whole exchange, seemed to have made up his mind as he resolutely marched up to Sakura and basically made the same declaration. Sakura grinned widely at the blond and repeated the same gesture to him and Naruto grinned just as wide as he enthusiastically shoved his own fist towards Sakura. 

"Is this some sort of weird Team Seven bonding session?" 

All three teammates startled at the new voice and whipped around in weird perfect synchrony to meet the unimpressed stare of one Yamanaka Ino, the rest of her teammates slowly making their way towards her. Sasuke scowled when he realized he didn't even notice her practically walking up to them. 

"Ino-pig!" Sakura exclaimed loudly as she reached out to hug the other girl. Ino rolled her eyes but hugged her back. Sasuke felt weirdly relieved when he realized they had made up; he had felt uncomfortable when they broke off their friendship just for him. 

"Shikamaru! Chouji! Hi!" Naruto scrambled forwards to greet the two other boys while Sasuke shoved his hands into his pockets and nodded cooly at them. 

"What's the rest of your team doing here, Billboard Brow? I thought we were going to prepare for your date?" 

"I could ask you the same thing, Ino-pig," Sakura challenged, seemingly out of habit. 

Imo shrugged as she waved her hand lazily towards her teammates, "Shikamaru makes a surprisingly good model and Chouji always hangs out with him, so here we are," 

"Just for the record, I did not agree to any of this," Shikamaru complained loudly as Naruto and Chouji had an enthusiastic conversation about ramen besides him. 

"Shut up, Shika, it's either this or chores at your house," 

Shikamaru grumbled something about troublesome women before backing down. Ino nodded, satisfied, before turning back to Sakura. 

"Oh, Sasuke said something about helping me prepare for the date and Naruto was kinda just dragged along," Sakura shrugged. 

Ino raised a judgmental eyebrow at Sasuke and he felt the strange urge to return the favor. 

"Sasuke-kun? I'm sorry sweetie, you're cute and I'm going to marry you someday, but that outfit is just not it. I doubt you'll be much help for Ugly over here," 

Sakura let out an indignant 'hey' but Sasuke was too pissed off to pay her attention, "Your hair must be covering too much of your eyesight, Yamanaka, because it seems like you haven't taken that much of a look in the mirror this morning," 

Chouji, Shikamaru, and Naruto had all stopped their conversation at some point, all of them gaping at Sasuke and Ino while Sakura tried to calm things down. 

Instead of retaliating though, Ino just threw her head back and barked out a laugh. Sasuke relaxed from where he had tensed up and stared at her in confusion. 

"Oh I'm going to enjoy this. Lead the way Brow; me and Sasuke-kun are about to give you a complete makeover,"

Ino looped her arms into Sakura's and they both marched off to what Sasuke assumed was Sakura's home. The rest of the boys looked as confused as Sasuke felt but they all shrugged and followed the two girls. 

Dinner with the Haruno's was... exciting, to say the least. Sakura's parents had greeted all of them warmly, if a bit forced when they reached Naruto, and invited them to their kitchen. Naruto had nearly cried tears of joy when he realized that they were eating ramen and kept thanking Sakura's mom profusely when she had tightly offered to give him some leftovers. Chouji had an in-depth conversation with Sakura's dad about the ingredients and methods he had used to make dinner while Ino chattered away to an overwhelmed looking Sakura. Shikamaru had declined the offer to eat and had simply decided to put his head down and take a nap. 

Sasuke had felt a bit awkward, sitting at the dinner table of one his teammates-previous-fangirl but was quickly inserted himself into the conversation when Ino mentioned something about fitting Sakura into some flannel. 

What had occurred next is what many people at the table would fearfully call the dreaded Color-scheme Debate From Hell. It ended up with Ino sending senbon towards Sasuke as they argued over clashing and complementary colors while Sasuke lodged a kunai hilt-deep into Ino's end of the table when she mouthed off about his arm warmers. 

They were _comfortable_ , they _protected_ him from the heat of his fire jutsus, and they did _not_ clash with the rest of his outfit, thank you very much. 

At the end they both decided to just ditch dinner as they raced up the stairs, dragging off an exhausted looking Shikamaru while the rest of the group trailed behind them. 

Once they were inside Sakura's room - _and wow it was pink why was it so bright_ \- Naruto hesitantly asked why they were dragging Shikamaru and not Sakura. 

Ino had smiled serenely at his question before pinning down Shikamaru with a piercing look from where he was trying to climb out the window, "C'mon, you're up Shikamaru-kun," 

Shikamaru grumbled as he climbed down and made his way into the center of the room, hands going through the appropriate seals for the henge jutsu. With a poof of white smoke, a disgruntled Sakura stood with her (his?) arms shoved into his pockets. 

"Perfect! Now, here's how it's gonna go: Me and Sasuke-kun will try and find some clothes for Sakura to wear on her date while Shikamaru models for us. Oh and don't worry, Billboard Brow, Shika won't actually wear your clothes; I've done this enough times for him to be able to just henge the clothes on him." Ino added once she saw Sakura's conflicted expression. 

Sasuke winced slightly at the implication that Ino had dragged Shikamaru to do this more than once, and from the sympathetic looks Chouji and Naruto shot him they caught on as well. 

Ino clapped her hands excitedly, "Well, Sasuke-kun? Let's begin!"

They spent the rest of the hour picking out clothes from Sakura's closet and showing them to Shikamaru as he henged into them. Sasuke was kind of impressed with how detailed Shikamaru' henges were but one scathing look from the lazy boy had him abandoning that trail of thought. 

Sasuke had never been one for companionship; preferring to train hard and long rather than waste his time on friends. But now, in Sakura's cramped pink room filed to the brim with discarded clothes, Naruto and Chouji shouting out weirder color combinations with every new henge and sniggering at Shikamaru's increasing contempt but reluctant amusement, Ino barking out skirt and top combos, and Sakura elbowing him and making fun of her behind her back, Sasuke thought he could get used to it. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> idk if y'all noticed but i avoided heavy dialogue bc i dont actually know anything about fashion and just threw around a bunch of words. i also didn't include what sakura's outfit ended up being because i genuinely have no idea lmao. also ino definitely forced shikamaru to model for her its canon i am simply speaking it into existence


	8. chapter eight

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TEAM GAI TEAM GAI TEAM GAI TWAM GAI. writing lee is surprisingly hard like what are his speech patterns lmaoo. also school is starting next week for me so idk if i will be able to maintain this update schedule

Tenten skipped happily through the streets of Konoha, Lee cheerfully matching her pace at her side from where their arms were interlocked. Neji didn't seem to share the same sentiment as he dragged his feet and complained while she dragged him along. 

Tenten didn't care though, her best friend is going on his first date and she'll make sure it's going to be prefect. It's nothing less than Lee deserved. So maybe she'll threaten this Sakura-chan a little bit, maybe even pull out a knife on her, it'll build character, really.

"Tenten! I am eternally grateful for your aid in my preparations for my date! The spirit of youth burns fiercely in you! Yosh! I shall run 30 laps around Konoha to show my gratitude! If I fail I will - mph!" 

Tenten gratefully smiled at Neji reached behind her and he slapped his hand over Lee's mouth; Gai-sensei sure helped out Lee a lot, but she'll never forgive him for instilling that stupid habit of declaring self imposed competitions. Neji just rolled his eyes as if to say _I told you so._

Tenten ignored him again as she dragged her boys towards the apartment complex she and Lee lived at. She kicked the doors open, as her hands were a bit preoccupied dragging along two pubescent boys, and marched towards the stairs with the air of a woman on a mission. She felt Neji lag again behind her, undoubtably looking around for a window to climb out of, and sighed inwardly at the slight manipulation it looks like she's going to have to execute. 

"Hey, Lee?" Tenten mischievously elbowed Lee, "Last one up the stairs is a rotten egg!" 

Lee screamed in all the competitive excitement he can possibly dredge up - which was a lot, Tenten winced as she covered her ears - and dashed up the stairs. She made to follow him but was nearly bodied by an equally intense Neji as he cooly reminded Lee that his destiny was to lose. 

Tenten sighed again at her boys' antics before dashing outside the stairwell and crashing through the doors of the building. She quickly ran around the building and started running up the walls. There's no way she'd let the boys win at her own game. 

She crashed through the window at the top of the staircase just in time to see Neji and Lee nearly barrel into her. Tenten smirked triumphantly as Neji whipped his head behind him - he probably thought she thought she was too mature to cheat, ha! as _if_ \- and glared at her, having figured out she had tricked him into not leaving and cheated to win. Lee shouted exuberantly and congratulated her for winning, declaring that he will climb up and down the stairs 50 times for his loss. 

Tenten grimaced slightly at the potential future noise complaints they'll get before shrugging, deciding to let future Tenten deal with that one. 

She grabbed both her teammates wrists' one more time and dragged them towards Lee's apartment. 

She and Lee had decided to rent out apartments in the same building after their graduation; they were officially adults in the eyes of the law and had been given a one month notice from their orphanage to find another place for them before they kicked them out. 

Luckily, both of them had been planning to move out for years and had quite a bit of money saved up from years of labour around the village; apparently civilians didn't care if they hired shinobi or not, as long as the job got done they'll pay. 

It had been pure luck that they had found this apartment complex; yeah the building was kinda shitty and the hot water only ran once every blue moon, and there was a concerning amount of mold everywhere, but it was cheap and also weirdly deserted except for one other person living in the building that neither Tenten nor Lee had ever met. 

They had moved into apartments that are next to each other, but sometimes Tenten wondered why they just didn't rent one and shared; Lee slept over at her apartment five night out of seven and she was always at his place for breakfast and lunch since she didn't know how to cook for shit. Lee called their sleepovers teammate bonding time but Tenten knew he was just unused to the eerie quiet of an empty apartment after a lifetime of screaming children at the orphanage, so she kept her mouth shut and casually ignored that teammate bonding exercises required all teammates to be present. 

Speaking of incomplete sleepovers, "You know, Neji - " Tenten began, trying to convince the Hyuuga to attend at least one slumber party, before being rudely cut off. 

"No." 

Tenten pouted but relented. _One day_ , she vowed, _one day she'll convince him._ Tenten made grabby hands at Lee and he obediently handed her his apartment keys. She unlocked and opened the door and made a beeline to Lee's room. 

She heard Lee politely offer Neji some water and Neji politely decline. She snickered at their stiffness as she threw open Lee's closet. Well, that was concerning, she thought as she took in the contents of the closet, no matter then she'll just check out his drawers! Her concern grew as each drawer yielded the same results. She grew more and more hysterical as she ripped through Lee's room. Finally she collected herself and with a calm, yet strained voice, called for her teammates. 

Lee and Neji ambled towards the room as Tenten tried to reign in her fury, she picked up one of the causes of her rapidly rising blood pressure and shook it in Lee's face. 

"Why," Lee fidgeted slightly at her tone while Neji's face grew several shades paler as he took in the sight of Lee's room, "do you only own green spandex clothing?" 

Neji made a choked noise and stumbled towards Tenten, as if proximity towards Lee would result in an obsession with green spandex. Actually, Tenten thought as she also inched further away from Lee, he might be onto something - this only happened after Lee's continuous exposure to Gai-sensei. 

"Um," Lee offered them as he shifted his weight from one foot to another, "I also own orange leg warmers?" 

Neji sounded like one of those caged birds he liked to drone about, just less alive, and Tenten just stared in amazement at the complete mess of a human being that stood before her. 

"Motherfucker," she said breathlessly. 

Lee met her gaze solemnly, "I have fucked no mothers," he informed her. 

Tenten gave herself three seconds to have a small inner breakdown before softly exhaling. " Okay, here's what we're going to do; we're going to the marketplace, we're gonna buy you some cute clothes to wear on your date, and then we're gonna have a small talk about work-life balance, understood?" 

Lee nodded nervously under her gaze while Neji took the opportunity to dart outside the room, muttering something about fresh air. Tenten didn't blame him; she'd been hit with the sudden urge to bleach her eyes and she didn't think it'll go away for a while. 

The three of them made their way out of Lee's apartment in silence, and Tenten took the time to take deep breaths and remind herself that killing her jounin sensei would not be the best course of action. 

As they approached the market place, Tenten cheerfully told Lee to go ahead without her and see if he liked anything. Lee excitedly agreed and made his way to one of the many stalls lined up against the street. 

"We can do it you know," Tenten jolted suddenly at Neji's voice and was even more taken aback at his frenzied look. 

"Do what?" Tenten questioned, genuinely baffled. 

"Take out Gai-sensei, with my byakugan and your weapons we can manage," Neji whispered. 

Tenten resisted the urge to agree with Neji and leave Lee in favor of committing treason, but held back at the last second. 

"We can't, his fucking rival is Hatake Kakashi, he'd wipe us out in a second; he doesn't care about us like Gai-sensei, we'd have no advantage," Neji still didn't look convinced, so Tenten readied herself to pull out the big guns. "Besides, Lee would get sad," 

Tenten watched as Neji's face fell; got 'em. She hid her grin as he grumbled and agreed, Neji could act as cold as he wanted, but she knew that he would rather kill himself than willingly upset Lee. 

"Well," Tenten clapped her hands together, "Let's buy this dumbass some clothes," 

Shopping ended up being more fun than expected. Of course, she had been more than ready to shut down Lee's ridiculous fashion choices, but was pleasantly surprised at the decent pile of clothes he had managed to procure. She had also been a little more than relieved when Neji seemed to at least know what he was doing as he picked out outfit after outfit; she had been a little nervous at how long she'll be able to bullshit her way through shopping before somebody realized that her fashion sense didn't extend past the easy understanding that green spandex is just not it. 

"I don't get it," Tenten had stated as her and Neji waited for Lee to come put of the changing room, Neji had raised an eyebrow at her as she continued, "I don't get how someone with a a good fashion sense like you dresses like that," 

Lee came out his changing room just as Tenten's face had begun turning a weird shade of blue as Neji choked her, face impassive as he handed Lee another bundle of clothes to try on. 

At the end they had decided on a green - Lee had insisted a part of his outfit contain that color - kimono style shirt with crisp black pants. Simple, but to the point, Neji had claimed while actively dodging Tenten's attempts to stab him, byakugan activated. 

They had been about to leave, hurrying to eat something before Lee left for his date, before something caught Tenten's eyes; hair clips. 

They were disastrous, they were ugly and loud and shaped like comical fists; Lee instantly loved them. It had been a hot debate, Neji arguing that they looked ridiculous while Tenten and Lee claimed that they were a form of self expression. In the end, Tenten and Lee managed to win him over by trying them on. Tenten stuck her tongue out in concentration as she brushed back Lee's bangs and held them back with the hair clips. Neji grudgingly admitted they looked good while the stall owner selling the clips laughed at their interaction. 

Team Gai made their way back to Lee's apartment with high spirits and Tenten even spotted a small smile on Neji's face. 

"So, about that sleepover -" 

"No" 

"....." 

"I'll think about it," 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> what did u guys think!!! yes i ripped off the whole "i have fucked no mothers" joke from a bhna todoroki comic, what of it.  
> the hair clips thing has been festering in my mind for literal DAYS and for anyone wondering, it was completely inspired by a tiktoker called austincantdrive he always wears hairclips in his videos and i think theyre neat


	9. chapter nine

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the way that i tried to spell catnip with a k and couldn't see anything wrong with it w/o autocorrect lmaooo.  
> anyways i said that this chapter was the date chapter well uh,,,, i lied lol.  
> kakashi is just several mental issues wearing a large trenchcoat, pass it on

Kakashi swept his eyes through the landscape, muscles tense as he prepared himself for any ambush, and carefully crept out of his apartment window. His breaths were shallow as he painstakingly scaled down the building, his figure hidden by the giant tree conveniently placed in front of his kitchen window. 

Kakashi released another breath as he reached the ground. He quickly scanned the parameter once more and prepared to dart into the foliage, planning on reaching the mission desk and getting a mission far, far away from the nightmare he was currently experiencing. 

When his genin team actually managed to pass his test, he cursed every single deity he was aware of and then some more; assigning him a genin team was a mistake and he had to convince the Hokage of that, the chuunin academy instructor besides him certainly agreed and Kakashi was immensely relieved to see another person with common sense. Now he wished he could take back those insults and get on his knees to pray for forgiveness, and a little mercy. 

His plan was to train the Uchiha kid with his Sharingan, avoid looking at his sensei's son who broke his heart every time he declared that _he'll become Hokage, dattebayo!,_ acting so much like Kushina it actually hurt, while paying no mind to the civilian pinky who probably won't make it past chuunin. 

And for two weeks it worked; he put them on annoying D-ranks and useless training, for the kunoichi more so than her teammates - but she didn't seem to notice anything past her infatuation with the Uchiha kid, while hiding his cowardly face behind a small orange book. 

And then Wave happened and he had to go and get attached to the little shits. Seriously, he should've just let Zabuza kill him. 

Kakashi wheezed suddenly as a green blur - _what the fuck when did Gai catch up to him he literally went through sewers to get to his apartment_ \- slammed into him. They both tumbled as they went down and Kakashi scrambled to throw Gai off of him. Gai went flying with a yelp while Kakashi tripped in his haste to leave. Gai took advantage of his slip up and bodied him. 

They both ended up tussling on the ground like a bunch of academy students. Kakashi suddenly decided, _fuck shame_ , and grabbed a fistful of Gai's hair and yanked. Gai hollered something about how hip and cool his rival is being before returning favor and pulled roughly at Kakashi's hair. Kakashi was just about to risk it all and pull down his mask to bite Gai as the spandex clad man smooshed his face into the ground, but wheezed again as another weight joined Gai on top of him and turned to glare at Asuma,who had literally sat on him. 

Asuma barked out a laugh and made himself more comfortable on Kakashi's poor bones. 

"Holy shit Asuma, what are you eating," Kakashi let his head hit the ground with a thud as Asuma made a vaguely affronted noise from on top of him. 

Kakashi heard Kurenai cackle and strained his ears to see who else has come to see his humiliating defeat. 

"You try feeding an Akimichi for two months straight without putting on a few kilos," Asuma grumbled and Kakashi picked up the soft laughter of Hayate and Genma's hyena laugh. 

"Who else has come to witness my misery," Kakashi sullenly mumbled into the ground. 

Kurenai tutted as she crouched to pet his hair complacently, "Oh Kakashi, we're not hear to laugh at your suffering," Kakashi could literally hear her razor sharp smile, "We're here to profit off of it," 

Kakashi cringed at being the subject of this months betting pool, no doubt orchestrated by Kotetsu, and briefly wondered how the fuck the rest of the village seemed to have caught on to his predicament before remembering that shinobi gossip like their life depended on it. 

But still, Kakashi mournfully woe'd, of all the people to send him into near cardiac arrest, he hadn't expected his cute little pink kunoichi to go off and fucking date Gai's son. 

Kakashi heard Gai sputter besides him - thank god he had gotten up; Kakashi didn't think his ribcage would last any longer - as he valiantly tried to deny his relationship with his obviously favored genin. Huh, he must've said that out loud. 

"Lee is not my son! Though the Power of Youth burns brightly in him! I-" 

"You picked him up from the academy everyday for nearly two years," Hayate pointed out with a small smile and a customary cough.

"It is simply too dangerous to let a child roam through the streets of Konoha unprotected!" 

"You regularly take him out for dinner." Genma snickered, obviously not buying it. 

"It is important for shinobi to maintain a healthy diet!" 

"You literally cried when he graduated and basically demanded he was put on your team," Kurenai added wryly as she continued to pet Kakashi's hair, marveling at its softness. 

Gai sputtered a bit more but Kurenai ignored him in favor of interrogating Kakashi on what type of shampoo he uses. Kakashi pretended to temporarily lose his hearing; he might not be above hair pulling and biting, but telling people he used the same shampoo as his dog ninken and, as he recently discovered, his genin kunoichi was crossing the fucking line. He also suspected Sasuke used it as well but decided to keep that piece of information for himself. 

"For fucks sake, Gai. Just adopt the kid and move on, he clearly sees you as a father figure anyways," Asuma said nonchalantly, flicking his cigarette at Kakashi. 

Gai stopped his sputtering and turned towards Asuma with a dazed expression. He then sat down, muttering the words 'father figure' over and over again. 

"Shit. Asuma, I think you broke him," Hayate worriedly poked an unresponsive Gai with his katana. 

"No no, this is great! Watching him stumble as he called that mini-clone of his anything but 'son' was almost as bad as watching Iruka stop himself from shoving adoption papers at Naruto whenever he so much as gets a paper cut." 

Kakashi raised his head to stare at Genma inquisitively, "Iruka-sensei wants to adopt Naruto?" 

Everybody in the clearing besides the still emotionally comatose Gai turned to stare incredulously at him. 

"Kakashi, are you dumb or do you just prefer to not acknowledge reality when it doesn't suit you?" 

Kakashi was very offended by that claim, and he made sure that Genma knew that; he ignored reality even if it does suit him. 

"But seriously though," Hayate began, " how did you not know? Iruka's been hounding after that kid since he was sixteen, I even heard the kid picked up most of his pranking ideas from him," 

All of them simultaneously shuddered as they remembered the type of pranks Iruka used to pull as a child. A small part of Kakashi was impressed that he managed to prank ANBU but the rest of him just dreaded at the thought of being caught in another glitter-bomb-laced-with-catnip-because-fuck-everyone prank. 

"But our focus today is not on dear Naruto-kun," Genma crowed, "It's on Sakura-chan," 

Kakashi let his head drop on the ground once more as his friends started betting on when Sakura and Lee will become the next dream duo, the position currently held by Kotetsu and Izumo. 

He really should've let Zabuza kill him. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter is a bit shorter than the rest bc i seemed to have contradicted a serious case of no thought head empty.  
> iruka is my fave character and i stand by the fact that he is probably naruto's most stable father figure, kakashi was more of a distant uncle and jiraiya was a perverted grandpa, no u cannot change my mind.  
> i deeply enjoyed writing this chapter as kakashi was close to suffocating the while time, hope i can do it again  
> imo iruka's past as a prankster is not as heavily discussed as i would like it to be and i like to think iruka wouldve passed on a couple of things to naruto when he first started teaching (which i think was a t sixteen) before realizing, Oh No im the adult here and wizening up slightly


	10. chapter ten

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ~i return after dipping for a solid week~  
> school just started and just ew yk? junior year isnt fun.  
> anyways, this chapter was a bit longer than the rest! i genuinely tried to wrote the ACTUAL FUKING DATE but apparently im subconsciously determined to keep up this snails pace. hope u guys enjoy it!

Sakura scowled as she struggled to zip up her dress, her reflection in the mirror practically mocking her, and sighed as she lowered her hands in defeat. After an hour of fighting and joking around, team seven and team ten had finally agreed on an outfit, much to Sakura's relief; she really didn't think she could handle the sight of Shikamaru henged into her slouching so much. She kept glancing towards the door of her room as if her mother was going to burst in and yell at her for her bad posture. 

Sakura sighed again and resignedly called Ino for help. The blonde barged into the bathroom without even knocking and Sakura, startled, threw the nearest object at to her. Ino dodged it effortlessly and let it sail behind her and smack right into Naruto's face, who had followed Ino at Sakura's call. 

Ino fluidly closes the door behind her and Sakura just managed to make out Naruto's screeching - ah, the mysterious object she had blindly thrown was apparently a box of tampons. 

"Should we check on him? I think the tampons might have scarred him for life," Sakura glanced at the door, concerned. 

Ino sniffed, uncaring, "Serves him right for following me. You want me to zip you up?" 

Sakura nodded and turned to face the mirror, taking one last look at her clothes. They had settled on one of her qipoa dresses, but mint green rather than her standard red, and black shorts that just came up to her knees. The zipper to this dress was on the back of it and was primarily the reason why Sakura didn't really wear it. 

Ino hummed as she brushed Sakura's hair away and quickly zipped her up. Sakura was just about to get up but was forcibly yanked down by Ino pulling on her hair. 

"Ow! Ino-pig! Lemme turn over I'm gonna strangle you i swear-" 

Ino snorted attractively and Sakura distantly felt awed and annoyed at the fact that that attractive snorting was possible, but her primary focus was to get her hands on the blond's neck. 

"Relax, Forehead. I just want to braid your hair, there's no way you're going out with your hair looking like that," Ino pointedly looked at yet another twig that had escaped Sakura's bathroom warpath this morning. Sakura scowled and settled down, cursing her own hair for betraying her. 

"Honestly, you've got such a temper on you, Forehead. There's no way anybody will marry you," Ino sighed dramatically as she reached for Sakura's hairbrush. 

"I'm sorry, did the person who never went on a date say something?" Sakura leaned against Ino as they bickered and felt - warm, was the only was she could explain it. Shehad missed being friends with Ino, and with every moment she spent with her, Sakura was reminded of that. She hummed distractedly as Ino regaled yet another neighborhood tale she managed to hear about from her spy network. 

"Hey! It isn't a spy network! It's a gossip group!" Sakura giggled and prepared to shoot back a response but Ino's hand that was carding through her suddenly stopped. Sakura shot a questioning look to Ino through the mirror. The blond didn't acknowledge her but rather bent down and - sniffed her hair? 

Sakura scowled and felt her temper rise yet again; okay she was kinda in a hurry this morning after her jog with Lee and didn't get to clean her hair as much as she liked, but it didn't smell bad.

Ino just limply held the strand of pink hair she was was busy untangling, a faintly disgusted look on her face. 

"My hair doesn't smell bad! Stop making that face!" Still, Sakura hesitantly grabbed a a stray strand and sniffed it. There was nothing wrong with it! She was about to go on a rant about how her hair smells magnificent, but Ino suddenly started talking.

"You and Sasuke use the same shampoo," 

Sakura stared at Ino, and was a little bit startled at the haunted expression she wore. 

"Is that - is that a bad thing? Don't you like him? What's with that face?" Sakura turned around to face her friend and snorted unattractively at the disgusted look on her face. Ino shrugged and answering. 

"I mean, three hours ago I would've dated the crap out of him, hell yeah. But now I know he smells like body AXE spray, uses Floral Green shampoo and argued over fabric with him. He reminded me of my mom." Ino wrinkled her noise and Sakura was sudden filled with dread at the idea of Sasuke meeting Ino's mom, identical sniffs of disdain peering down on her. "I guess it just wasn't meant to be. Besides, I should be the one asking you that; Sasuke was basically frisking you the whole time and you didn't even blink!" 

Sakura reeled back, affronted. "May I remind you that I'm literally going on a date. With someone else. Who is not Sasuke." 

Ino snorted as she reached for the hairbrush again, hand carding through her hair determinedly, "Sakura, honey, you don't just decide to stop having a crush. Now spill," 

Sakura flushed and opened her mouth to deny vehemently that she knew that, point out that Ino is doing the same same thing, but closed it again as she realized that she actually did stop having a crush on Sasuke.

Maybe it was when Sasuke had basically shoved himself in her private space as he mixed and matched outfits on her while Ino ordered Shikamaru around in different henge-outfits. Or when he had even bent down to tie her hitai-ate around her ankle, muttering something about it being a statement while Ino judged the very angle he was tying the fabric on, but the only emotion she had mustered at the time was annoyance and the brief urge to take advantage of Sasuke's guard being down and kicking him in the face. 

He had insulted one of her stuffed animals as soon as he spotted them, but Sakura wasn't fooled; she'd seen the way he'd eyed Mr. Octoeye - the weird stuffed eyeball that had tentacles sprouting from it that her father had bought from Oto - and it had been filled with too much longing for any of his insults to properly land. 

It was Sakura's time to shrug when she noticed Ino's expectant gaze on her and turned around back in her seat to face the mirror again. "I dunno, I think I did just decide to do that," 

Ino laughed at her response and finished untangling her hair. Both girls sat in silence, the only noise coming from Ino as she hummed an old tune Sakura couldn't place. Sakura closed her eyes and focused on Ino's warm fingers running through her hair and twisting it into a braid. 

Ino clapped her hands together after a bit and announced she was ready. Sakura opened her eyes and surveyed the braid, shaking her head to see it from different angles, and almost ate her own bangs. She pushed them back with a huff and started to look for something to tie them back with. 

She was stopped by Ino and Sakura shot a questioning glance at her before seeing the bright red ribbon held tightly in her hand. 

"Do you wanna wear this?" Ino asked hesitantly, as if she was scared Sakura would refuse, and Sakura felt the sudden hot urge to break the flow of time itself and slap her younger self silly. 

"Of course. C'mon, you can tie it for me." Sakura firmly told Ino and settled back down. She heard Ino hum again as she threaded the ribbon through her hair, and had an intense wave of deja vu as she remembered the countless times this exact scene had happened. Sakura basically drilled a hole into Ino's head as she stared at her reflection in the mirror; never again, she vowed, will she throw away another friendship for a stupid boy. 

"Alright! Now we're done!" Sakura stood up and turned to best friend, throwing her arms around her while she ignored Ino's tight voice and Ino pretending not to notice her wet eyes. 

"This Lee character is gonna be swept off his feet, believe it," Ino proudly surveyed her work and Sakura was suddenly hit with the similarities that Ino and Naruto share, then cringed as she thought about the amount of trouble they would probably cause if left together unsupervised; they're a bit too similar. 

Ino looped her arms through Sakura's and guided her out the bathroom. They both entered her bedroom and Ino shoved Sakura towards the center of the room. 

"Behold, the sight of a tamed creature." Ino solemnly gestured, ducking under Sakura's swiping hand. 

Chouji and Shikamaru snorted - but not in an ugly way, is it a skill? Does one gain it after hanging out with Ino too much? - while Sasuke dropped one of her stuffed animals he was toying with, poor Mr. Octoeye, and rushed towards her. Sakura groaned and complained as he fussed over the creases on her dress but inwardly vowed to get him a plushie some day, Naruto as well with how he's basically suffocating poor Mr. Froggy. 

Speaking of Naruto, he was looking at her with stars in his eyes, loudly proclaiming his opinions. 

"Woah!! Sakura-chan! You look so cute!! If that Lee guy doesn't treat you well he's gonna hear from me, dattebayo!" 

Sakura snorted as she reached out and tugged at Naruto's bangs to shut him up, and wondered if this is what it feels like to have a younger brother. 

"If you guys don't leave now, you'll be late y'know." Shikamaru drawled from her bed as he woke up from the nap he proclaimed to be necessary for his health and drained chakra stores, hand curled around her stuffed pink deer. 

Sakura wondered briefly why her friends were colonizing her plushies - even Chouji had a stuffed strawberry in his lap - before she snapped her head to the clock and - yep, it was 5:45. The date is in 15 minutes! 

"Alright everyone, move out! Out! Come on! Forehead has people to see, places to be at!" 

Both teams scrambled as they hurriedly made their way out of Sakura's house, except for Shikamaru who basically dragged his feet as he made his way down the stairs. 

There was barely any time for her mother to crush her into a hug but her father, unrestrained by the concept of time, tagged behind her with a camera, snapping a shot at every move. Ino grabbed Sakura suddenly, yelling something about being late at the two smiling adults. Sakura had only just got a glimpse of her parents handing Naruto a bento of leftovers and offering him a small yet sincere smile - they were warming up to him! - before being pushed out the front door. 

Ino grabbed her hand and laced their fingers together, and grabbed Sasuke by his collar while she yelled at Shikamaru to hurry it up. Naruto and Chouji came out seconds later with a laidback Shikamaru trailing behind them. 

Sakura grinned as she and her friends made their way loudly to the dango shop at the marketplace. This date was going to be awesome. 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Naruto chattered happily next to Chouji, both of them talking about their favorite brands of chips while they picked out clothes for Sakura-chan's date. Well, Ino and Sasuke-teme did, for some reason they both looked green when he offered a yellow and neon green combo. 

When he found out about Sakura-chan going on a date, he'd been surprised and then annoyed; he wanted to date Sakura-chan! 

But then she said he was being rude and dis-res-pect-ing her boundaries. Naruto didn't really get it but then understood what she meant when Sasuke-teme said he didn't like her asking him out every day. Now he just wants Sakura-chan to have a really good date. 

Sakura-chan said Lee was a good guy, but she also had a crush on Sasuke for like forever, so he had his doubts. 

He'd been surprised when Teme offered to help Sakura-chan prepare for her date, and was slightly apprehensive at the thought of meeting Sakura's parents; adults were rarely nice to him. 

So he kept quiet during lunchtime and hoped the two adults didn't notice him. It was useless of course, and Naruto saw the wary looks they shot him before covering it up with too tight smiles. Naruto told himself he didn't care, that it was better than them actively shunning him. 

And then they went to Sakura-chan's room, and it was so pink! And she had so many stuffed animals! At first he was scared Sakura-chan would get mad if he touched them but Sasuke-teme was allowed to hug one so Naruto took his chances. 

He spent two hours laying on the floor of Sakura-chan's bedroom, laughing and smiling, wishing it would never end. But then he got hit with a box of tampons. 

Naruto pouted from the floor as he picked up the tampons box and looked around for a place to shove it in, he briefly considered throwing it as Sasuke-teme but was jolted out of his scheming as Sakura-chan's mother approached him. 

"Naruto-kun! What are you doing here?" Mebuki offered him another of her tight smiles and Naruto replied with a fake smile himself, the one where he smiles so big his eyes close and you can't see the hurt in them. 

"Nothin' much! Just lookin' for somewhere to out this box in!" 

Mebuki's eyes slid to the box of tampons Naruto was waving around and quickly snatched it out his hands. 

"Ah, thank you Naruto-kun. This is a special girls box, so I'm really glad you were able to return it," Mebuki hurriedly stored away the box in a nearby cabinet, desperately searching for a topic change. 

"Hah? I know what tampons are, dattebayo!" Naruto huffed indignantly as he crossed his arms behind his head. 

"Oh really? Do you have another friend that told you?"Mebuki beckoned for him to follow her as she stored away the box of tampons and made her way downstairs. 

"Nah, I don't have other friends," Naruto was too distracted looking at Sakura-chan's baby photos to catch the slight flinch from Mebuki, "But there're a lot of dirty shi- stuff all around the Red District. Like needles 'n stuff!" Naruto brightly explained as he took another look at the photo of baby Sakura-chan riding a bike, it's definitely his favorite. 

Mebuki stayed silent as she lead them towards the kitchen and gave Naruto a tray of snacks. Naruto perked up at the food and excitedly took the tray, thanking Mebuki as he turned to go back up, but was stalled as Mebuki laid a hesitant hand on his shoulder. 

Naruto tensed and turned around, did he do something wrong? Maybe he shouldn't have looked at those pictures, Jiji always talked about people's privacy and stuff. 

Naruto was snapped put of his worrying as Mebuki began to talk talk, "Naruto-kun, my husband and I are aware that the conditions you live in are," Mebuki faltered slightly but went on, " less than ideal. But if you need anything, like a hot meal or just to see Sakura-chan, our door is open." 

Naruto stared at Mebuki, eyes shining, while the mother shifted uneasily and offered him a small smile, but still sincere. 

That seemed to do it for the blond boy as tears start to well up in his eyes. They cared! Naruto thought the only adults that would ever care about him would before he became Hokage would be Iruka-sensei and Jiji. Naruto carefully set the tray on the kitchen counter and wiped furiously at his eyes. Mebuki retracted her hand and silently offered him a hanker chief. Naruto loudly blew his noise and collected himself. He resisted the urge to throw his hands around her and hug her; he and Sakura-chan had just had a conversation about boundaries and he wont disappoint her, dattebayo! 

Mebuki handed him the tray again and Naruto took it with a wobbly smile. 

"Thanks Mebuki-san!!" 

Mebuki smiled tiredly and Naruto wondered what she'd been doing for the past three hours to warrant that. 

Mebuki smiled again and ruffled his hair, then shooed him upstairs. Naruto was glowing as he bounded up the stairs, an extra bounce in his step. 

He went to kick the door open but felt the ghost of Iruka-sensei yelling about manners, so opted for gently nudging the door open with his foot.

"I come bearing snacks!" Naruto brandished the tray at the three boys, a little bit more at Chouji than the others. 

Chouji made excited grabby hands at him and Naruto flounced to where he was sitting. Shikamaru mumbled something about not being hungry. 

"Hey, Sasuke, you like tomatoes right? You ate a lot of them during dinner" Chouji picked up the tray of cherry tomatoes and waved them at Sasuke. 

"Eww. Teme, you like vegetables?! They're gross, dattebayo," Naruto wrinkled his nose as Sasuke swiped the tray from Chouji's outstretched hand and went back to brooding silently in a corner, just now with a bunch of tiny tomatoes.

"Vegetables aren't gross, Dobe. You're just an idiot who doesn't eat anything other than ramen." 

Sasuke scowled from his position next to Sakura-chan's stuffed animals that he'd been eyeing the whole time. Naruto would've made fun of him if he weren't longingly staring at the stuffed frog sitting at the dresser. He resigned himself to just memorizing the way it looked and hopefully finding and buying it the next time he goes to the market, if he doesn't get kicked out again.

Naruto suspected he and Sasuke would just end up staring at the plushies with equal looks of longing, but both were jolted out of their thoughts as Shikamaru sat up suddenly and surprised Naruto and Sasuke with his demand. 

"Oi, Sasuke. Hand me that stuffed deer," 

Sasuke hesitantly grabbed the bright pink plushie and tossed it at Shikamaru. Shikamaru then curled around it and went back to sleep. 

"Sakura won't get mad if you take them, Ino has the same exact collection and she always forces me and Chouji to play with her. Troublesome woman," Shikamaru grumbled from the bed as Chouji snickered and nodded in agreement. 

"He's right, gimmie that strawberry Sasuke,"

Sasuke eyed Shikamaru's snoring form dubiously but threw the bright red plushie at Chouji. Sasuke then hesitated a bit but went for both the eyeball plush and frog. 

Naruto startled as the froggie was thrown at his face. The plush landed in his lap and Naruto reached out and marveled at its softness. He picked it up and hugged it tightly to his chest. Sasuke nodded at him before fiddling around with the tentacles on the weird eyeball plush. 

The next ten minutes passed in relative silence; Shikamaru snoring softly while Chouji and Sasuke munched on their snacks. Naruto watched the leaves sway in the light breeze outside the window and felt something warm settle in his chest. 

Suddenly, Ino barged in with Sakura-chan in tow. She shoved Sakura towards the center with a flourish of her hand, "Behold, the sight of a tamed creature," 

That was another surprise of today; Ino turned out to be pretty cool. Naruto just thought she was one of Sasuke-teme's fangirls but she was really funny and didn't make fun of Naruto's clothes like she did with Sasuke. And like she did the whole evening while she went through Sakura-chan's closet. Naruto didn't blame her; everybody knew orange was superior to red. 

Shikamaru and Chouji snorted at Ino and Naruto would've joined them but he was too busy marveling at Sakura-chan now that he'd taken a good look at her after Sasuke finally stopped fussing; she looked so pretty!!! That Lee guy better treat her right, dattebayo! 

Naruto startled slightly when Sakura-chan snorted, he must've said that out loud, and braced himself for the incoming fist. He was pleasantly surprised when Sakura-chan just pulled at his bangs a little and smiled. 

Naruto grinned at her and was about to reply again about how good she looked in her dress, but was suddenly rushed downstairs as Ino yelled something about being late. He sprinted down the stairs with Chouji and snickered with him as Sakura-chan's dad took a concerning amount of pictures while Mebuki-san strangle-hugged her. Ino yelled again and grabbed Sakura-chan's hand to drag her out. Naruto went to follow her but was stopped by Sakura-chan's parents approaching him with a wrapped bento. 

"Here you go Naruto-kun. Our offer still stands if you ever want to swing by," Kizashi-san handed him the bento with a small yet sincere smile and Naruto felt like an inflated balloon from how happy he was. 

" 'Course! Thanks Kizashi-san, Mebuki-san!" 

Naruto then turned and thundered outside the house with the bento clutched tightly in his hands. The two teams took to the streets and ran furiously between the bypassers. Well, most of them did; Shikamaru was still dragging his feet. 

Ino seemed to not tolerate that though, because she unlaced her fingers with Sakura-chan and stormed up to Shikamaru and then threw him over her shoulder. 

Shikamaru squawked from his position at Ino's shoulders, "Ino, you troublesome woman! What are you doing?!" 

Imo harrumphed as she adjusted her grip on her teammate, "Listen, my little sprout is about to blossom into a beautiful flower and I won't have you ruin it because you're lazy!" 

"What does that even mean?!" Shikamaru complained loudly, but slumped as he seemingly accepted his fate. "Chouji, I can't believe you aren't even trying to help me," 

Chouji just giggled and opened up another bag of chips, "I know a losing battle when I see one, and besides," Chouji's smile looked a bit more like a smirk now, "it would be troublesome,"

Shikamaru groaned again and let his head hang. 

Naruto watched the exchange with growing glee and threw a pointed look at Sasuke. Sasuke violently shook his head and hissed wordlessly at him. Sakura-chan, who had remained silent the whole time, smiled deviously from where she inched behind Sasuke and waved at Naruto to show him she's on board. Naruto discreetly handed her his bento behind Sasuke's back and got ready to risk his life for comedy. 

"Dobe, stop it; I'm not letting you carry me. Besides, we're already making a scene," Sasuke jerked his head at the people around them laughing at them as the teams speed walked through the crowds. 

"Too bad you don't have a choice~" 

Sasuke jumped at Sakura-chan's voice right next to his ear and Naruto quickly rushed in to wrap his arms around the Teme and throw him around his shoulders like Ino. Sakura-chan cackled loudly and highfive-d Naruto. 

Naruto grinned and ignored Sasuke's screeching and flailing hands armed with kunai as he picked up his pace and sprinted past Ino, Sakura-chan hot on his heels. 

"Last to the dango shop is a dull kunai, dattebayo!" 

Ino shouted something about cheating but ran after them, Shikamaru clutching on for dear life while Chouji laughed and sprinted after them. 

They made their way to the marketplace in no time, and Naruto graciously dropped Sasuke on the ground. The teme just rolled to his feet and bonked him on his head. Naruto yelped as he clutched his head in pain and went to punch Sasuke but was held back by Chouji as Sasuke went to fuss over Sakura-chan's clothes one last time. 

Finally they said their goodbye's to Sakura and wished her a happy date. Sakura-chan handed Naruto his bento back and skipped happily to the dango shop, waving back at them before entering the shop. 

Naruto spun on his heel to face the rest of his friends and felt sad that they had to part their ways. Shikamaru seemed to be feeling the opposite as he stretched from his place on the ground; he didn't bother getting up after Ino dropped him. 

"Finally, I can go take a nap," 

Imo whipped around to face her teammate, "Finally? Oh honey; the evening had just started,"

"Really?" Naruto perked up; he gets to hang out with his friends more!

"Yep! You think I would just abandon my best friend and rival at her first date? What do you take me for!" 

Naruto didn't exactly take Ino for anything, maybe scary, but he still nodded furiously to agree with her.

"But what are we gonna do?" Chouji wondered as he opened yet another bag of chips. 

Shikamaru snorted, " Probably spy on Sakura, knowing Ino," 

Ino just smiled sharply without saying anything. Naruto was just ecstatic that he could spend some more time with his friends. 

Sasuke scowled and shoved his hands in his pockets as Ino surveyed the crowd around them, presumably looking for a spot to hide in. 

"Sakura isn't stupid; she'd notice a group of genins following her around. Besides, her date is one of our senpais, if Sakura doesn't spot us, he definitely will," 

Naruto wilted slightly at Sasuke's complaints, but Ino just slung her arm around her fellow blond and leaned closer to Sasuke, pulling Naruto down with her. She motioned for Chouji to follow and grabbed Shikamaru's collar to drag him forwards. 

"Ah, but you see," Ino murmured softly, hands covering her mouth, "we're gonna be a group of genins and jounins spying on her, at least, that's what they think we're gonna do," 

Naruto was thoroughly confused, and so were Chouji and Sasuke. Shikamaru just looked exasperated and groaned at Ino. 

Before any of them could question the girl, Ino spun on her heel to face a bunch of bushes and address them. 

"Isn't that right, Asuma-sensei?" 

Naruto was beyond concerned now, and considered grabbing Ino and taking her to the nearest hospital;did she hit her head or something?

Naruto jumped back though, when the bushes melted away to reveal a jumble of adults crouched in the foliage, spying on Sakura-chan's date it seemed. The guy with the cigarette in his mouth - Asuma - scratched his beard idly as he grinned at Ino. 

"Eh? Managed to break out of Kurenai's genjutsu? That's impressive," 

"Psh, I'm not that good at genjutsu, Asuma-sensei. I'd be a prodigy if I was able to break out of Kurenai-san's genjutsu. It wouldn't be surprising though, considering hew much you talk about her- oomph!"

"Alright Blondie, that's enough for now," Asuma covered Ino's mouth with his hand and then lifted and held her at his waist like a skateboard. 

Naruto didn't know who Kurenai is, and judging by Sasuke's awkward shifting, neither did he. Naruto suspected it was the blushing pretty lady but wasn't really sure. He scanned the crowd of older shinobi making their ways out of the bushes and spotted a silver mop of gravity-defying hair. 

"Kaka-sensei!!" You're spying on Sakura-chan too?!" 

Kakashi-sensei's eye crinkled as he smiled at them and scratched the back of his head, "Maa, I'm just making sure my cute little genin doesn't end up going home wearing bright spandex,"

One of the mysterious shinobi from the bush snorted at that but Naruto was just confused, and a quick sneak peak at Sasuke and Chouji showed that they shared his sentiment. Shikamaru just flopped on the ground and covered his eyes with his hands, muttering something about Sakura not joking about bright green suits. 

Naruto, who was not a patient child, was just about to march up to Kakashi-sensei and demand an explanation, but was stalled at the loud arrival of another mysterious shinobi with two kids around Naruto's age, one boy that looked remarkably like Hinata and a girl with two buns, trailing exasperatedly after him. 

Naruto watched in confusion, again, as the weird green spandex guy yelled loudly about power of youth. 

"- yosh! Let us rejoice in the flowering Power of Youth and share our joys with this new budding romance, my Cool and Hip rival!" 

Naruto felt slightly overwhelmed at all the people standing in front of the dango shop, with the weird spandex guy yelling at Kakashi-sensei while the rest of the unnamed shinobi snickered at them. 

"Can you guys please quiet down, Sakura and Lee aren't even here anymore; they left a while ago, saying something about water walking," Shikamaru offhandedly mentioned as he gazed at the clouds. 

Ino groaned in annoyance, "Shika~, why did you say it out loud! Now we can't make these people leave Sakura alone for her date," 

"Wait, that was your plan?" Asuma lifted Ino from the scruff of her shirt and brought her to eye-level. 

Ino grabbed her sensei's hand and kicked at the joint of his elbow to make him let go, "Yep, you and your friends are way too nosy, sensei,"

Asuma gaped while the rest of the group roared in laughter. Shikamaru tried to take advantage to slip away from the group but was caught by the two kids that came with the weird spandex guy. 

"Well, why don't you show us where they went, smartass?" The girl with the buns smiled sweetly while the Hinata-look alike gazed impassively at him. 

Shikamaru grumbled something about all this being troublesome, and Naruto, after taking stock of all the people loitering around waiting for an answer, was inclined to agree. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ayee i hope u guys liked it!!! theres some thing i wanted to explain, like how imo and sakura just nope'd their way out if their crushes. its basically me playing with the idea that when u actually spend time w a person ur crushing on, sometimes theyre not as glamorous as they seem. and also that one ick trend w girls trying to get over their bf. idk thats how i see it would go down.  
> writing naruto was rly fun but like sad as well, but adding dattebayo after almost every sentence is addicting.  
> also ino just wants her besty to have cute date w/o konoha's finest spying on her


	11. chapter eleven

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ahahha heyy guys sorry for literally ghosting yall for three weeks 😳 i underestimated how completely braindead i become during school days. anywayssss here's the date chapter!! finally!! i feel like its v anticlimactic and could b better but i literally could not bring myself to change anything. hope u enjoy it!

Sakura grinned and waved at her teammates as she turned towards the wooden door. This is finally it! Sakura skipped happily inside the dango shop, scanning its occupants for Lee. 

"Sakura-chan! My lovely flower!" Lee boomed loudly from his table, a tiny booth crammed at the back of the shop, flapping his arms around excitedly. 

Sakura giggled and rushed over towards Lee, dodging the glares and coos of the customers in the shop. 

"Lee! You look great! That shirt is totally your style! And those hairclips! I love them!" Sakura gushed happily as she sat down, blushing pleasantly at the thought that Lee went out of his way to dress up for their date. Lee blushed as well and fingered the ornaments in his hair. 

"Thank you! My teammates helped me pick it out! Although the star of the evening is definitely you!" Lee gushed right back at her, gesturing wildly at her. 

Sakura blushed again and went to compliment Lee once more, but was distracted by a flurry of movement right outside the window facing the front of the dango shop. She twisted in her seat and squinted, trying to make out the several blobs loitering outside the shop. 

"Is- is that Kakashi-sensei?" Sakura almost didn't believe her eyes, but that atrocious hairstyle was impossible to miss. 

Lee nearly threw the table over in his haste to get closer, almost vibrating with excitement. 

"Hatake Kakashi!! My Sensei's hip and cool rival! You must be very talented to have a proficient jounin as him for your sensei!"

Sakura turned around to face Lee, who had now shifted from sitting across from her to directly next to her, with a tight smile. She forced down the growing ball of bitterness that surfaces at the mention of her lacking skills, and more recently, her sensei. Once again cursing her lack of motivation and hardwork during her Academy days, Sakura felt a bit underwhelmed thinking about why exactly she was placed in team seven. 

Team ten had been determined since birth; the next coming of Ino-Shika-Cho. Team eight were a tracking team with an Aburame, Inuzuka, and Hyuuga on it. Logically, team seven would be a combat team, what with Naruto's unending stamina and Shadow Clones, and Sasuke's Uchiha heritage and Sharingan. 

And then there's Sakura. 

Sakura resisted the urge to shake her head and shoved down the bubbling resentment towards Kakashi-sensei. She was on her first date and she was going to enjoy it, team placements and insecurities be damned. 

"Kakashi-sensei and your sensei are rivals? Weird, I never heard him mention anything about a Gai-sensei," Sakura wondered out loud as she twisted again and tried to spot another familiar face, or scalp in this case. She flushed when she realized how rude her statement is, but before she could begin to apologize Lee came forth with another outburst. 

"Ah yes! Kakashi-sensei is a very private person! But his competitive spirit is not to be dismissed!"

Sakura blinked slowly and tried to imagine her chronically-late-to-everything-sensei put effort into anything other than antagonizing her fellow teammates and reading porn. 

Lee must've caught on to her doubtful expression and recounted a couple of challenges his team had witnessed between their senseis. 

The first one with the rather anticlimactic rock-paper-scissors match was easy enough to imagine, but as Lee went on the challenges became more and more bizarre, and Sakura had to desperately hold in her snorts and maintain the respect she hold for her sensei. But she lost her composure when Lee loudly bemoaned the loss of his sensei during an impromptu dance-off. 

"There's no way Kakashi-sensei managed to outdo Gai-sensei in the Zumba dance! He has no rhythm!" Sakura blurted suddenly, startling both Lee and the couple sitting in the booth next to them. Said coupleturned around and glared at Sakura and Lee before hissing at them to "keep quiet brats". 

Lee and Sakura shared a look and quickly dissolved into giggles, failing at containing their volume as more and more people started shooting them nasty looks. Sakura shoved her face into the crook of her elbow while Lee pulled up the collar of his shirt in an attempt to muffle his laughs. 

Both of them were shaking and twisting in their seats, trying to calm down. Their mirth was short lived however, when a strict waitress sharply asked them to leave the shop as they were causing too much of a ruckus and haven't even ordered anything. 

Sakura, in any other situation, would've been mortified at the thought of being kicked out of a restaurant. But now as she slipped out of her seat with half formed apologies and giggles, dragging an equally hysterical Lee behind her, she couldn't find a drop of shame in her. 

Lee and Sakura stumbled out of the shop clutching their stomachs and roaring with laughter as they tried to twist their faces in a copy of the disgruntled couple that originally told them off. When Sakura was finally able to breath properly, she turned to Lee with a smile while feeling particularly bold, " Next date, we're definitely gonna spy on our senseis during their challenges." 

Sakura grinned as she watched Lee stumble and blush. Shannaro! Haruno women always make the first move! 

" I would highly enjoy that! Observing our senseis would give us a glimpse of their experiences! It would also be funny!" Lee struck a pose and beamed at her. 

Sakura giggled and went to ask Lee what he would like to do now, but stopped as Lee suddenly wilted and lowered his hand from his pose. 

" Ah, it seems I have forgotten about the upcoming Chuunin Exams. I will probably be too occupied training for them with my team to prepare. But worry not; I'll free up time for my precious flower!" 

Lee regained his composure and beamed again, but Sakura was too busy being completely thrown off from what he said; Chuunin Exams? They're being held in Konoha? When? 

Sakura voiced her questions to Lee as she nervously played with the hem of her dress. Kaka-sensei might sign them up, and while Sasuke and Naruto might be able to pull their weight, Sakura wasn't so sure about herself. 

Lee cocked his head to the side, not unlike a puppy, and answered her with confusion lacing his tone, " Yes, they're being held in three months. Has your sensei not informed you of this? Most teams are undergoing heavy training right now." 

Sakura winced as she thought back to her teams' training session earlier this day, alternating between playing with the hem of her skirt and her braid; Kakashi-sensei hadn't mentioned anything about exams. 

Her anxiety must've been obvious as Lee waved his hands and heavily assured her that most genin teams skip out the first exams while they're newly minted genins. Sakura felt slightly relieved, but was surprised at the disappointment that accompanied it. She had never noticed it, but it seems like deep down, Sakura wanted to prove herself. 

Sakura steeled herself for her next request, her stomach twisted in knots. She wanted to be a better shinobi, but ever since she graduated from the academy, everyone seemed to brush her off in favor of her teammates. 

"Lee, would you mind teaching me how to water-walk? I mean, if my team is signed up to the exams, I should know that basic skill right?" 

Lee paused his fretting and smiled widely at her, "Of course! Your dedication is admirable! Yosh! Let us enjoy our flowering Springtime of Youth!" 

Sakura felt like an inflated balloon; although she knew Lee wouldn't be the type to ignore her requests, her insecurities lingered. She thanked Lee profusely but he just waved her off with an exuberant grin. 

Lee turned on his heel and began walking to what Sakura assumed was a nearby lake. She was immensely relieved that he had his back to her as she hastily swiped at her teary eyes. Bawling in the middle of her first date would not be one of her finest moments. 

Just as they were about to approach the lake, Sakura smacked her head as she suddenly remembered something. Lee startled and turned around, confusion clear on his face as Sakura winced and rubbed her red forehead. 

"Ah, Lee I almost forgot to tell you! I had an idea to do a bit of joint training with genjutsu! That way I can practice on making mine as good as possible and you can practice breaking out of them!"

Lee, for once, seemed to be at a loss for words. He stared at her for a while and Sakura wrung her hands nervously as she reexamined her words. Had she overstepped? Would Lee be offended? Honestly, it was a bit pretentious of her to offer to help an older, much experienced genin. However, Sakura was jolted put of her thoughts as Lee started sniffling. 

Sakura stared in horror as Lee wiped his eyes, a mirror of herself not two minutes ago. Her hands hovered awkwardly in front of her, unsure if Lee would appreciate or even want any comfort right now. It turned to be unneeded anyways as Lee quickly pulled himself together and offered her a wobbly smile. 

"I would highly appreciate training with you, Sakura! I was just surprised by your proposal! Nobody really believed in me other than Gai-sensei," Lee chuckled awkwardly as be rubbed the back of his neck. 

Sakura, not for the first time, was filled with the overwhelming urge to poison whoever discouraged Lee ever. Now, that urge was accompanied with the weird desire to meet up with Lee's sensei. 

Sakura sniffed and linked her arm with Lee's, startling him as she lead them towards the lake. "Anyone who ever looked down on you is an idiot; I haven't even seen you fight yet and I know you're an amazing shinobi. Now let's train as hard as we can and make Chuunin together."

Lee's mood seemed to have returned to its normal enthusiasm as he heartily agreed with her and tugged her towards the lake. Sakura grinned again and felt her cheeks burn from how wide she was smiling. 

She listened eagerly as Lee brightly explained the theory behind the technique. She watched in awe as Lee effortlessly glided over the surface of the water. Lee had explained to her that the technique was a bit tricky, and had taken him and his team nearly two weeks to properly master, but Sakura for once wasn't discouraged. She'd been told she had excellent chakra control, and if her sensei won't do anything about it, then she will. 

The look on Lee's face when he fell into the water just as she managed to stand on the surface of water on shaky legs, only 20 minutes into the exercise, was worth the ice cold water that greeted her when she lost her concentration laughing at his gobsmacked expression. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sooo what did yall think!! im v much making sakura feel like the ignored middle child in her team dynamics and lee getting them sad sad confidence issues. i feel like while tenten very much encourages lee its not the same effect as gai and sakura since in this fic he's been friends w tenten since forever.  
> i spent (1) one week nearly bawling my eyes bc i kept remembering how gai literally promised he'd take his own life if lee doesnt survive his surgery like sir pls my heart cant handle this 😿.  
> this chapter ate my ass out and not in the smexy way i literally could not write this bitch the whole time i was just no thoughts head empty.  
> anywaysss on a more personal note i kinda have exams lmao 👁👁 theyre during oct/nov so i cant rly promise any updates but ill try my best!  
> the vibe i was desperately striving for here was cloud nine by beach bunny which is just a wholeass masterpiece ❤️✨💕/10  
> also i cannot believe the audacity to just forget about sakura's verbal tic and not include shannaro!!! ill have to edit the previous chapters lol  
> oh and i was thinking about adding chapter titles but like percy jackson clickbait titles type of beat! would u guys like that?


	12. sometimes love is your middle aged sensei teaching you nothing but stalking you at your date

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ayoo heres ch12!!! another kakashi pov!! i love playing the game of running this man into the ground. im planning on altering the chapter titles from the beginning but im glad u guys liked the idea!

Kakashi twitched as Genma and Anko shoved each other behind his back,Gai whispering furiously about the blossoming power of youth or something. Kakashi wasn't exactly paying attention to anything other than the growing migraine that reared its head every time someone so much as coughed, which made Hayate's very presence a danger to his poor head. 

Kakashi surveyed the remaining genin standing outside the dango shop. He had expected them to loiter around for a bit before getting bored and leaving, so it had been a bit of a surprise when the blond kid (what was her name? Iwa? Iki? No, no she's the Yamanaka heir it was something Ino-y) suddenly turned around and faced the bush they were hiding in. And wasn't that a sight; Konoha's elite failing to hide from a genin. Kakashi did give the Yamanaka points for targeting Asuma and Kurenai's clear interest in each other; nothing beats being smacked down by your own genin. Kakashi had tried to escape, of course, but Gai had a vice like grip on arm and Kakashi feared he'd walk away without the limb if he tried to make him let go.

When the Nara boy loudly complained about Sakura and Lee having already abandoned the dango shop, Kakashi was elated; does this mean they'd lose track of the brats? Can he go back to being entirely emotionally unavailable?

All his hopes were dashed when Gai's stick-up-his-ass Hyuuga brat - no Hayate, I am not above degrading children - and weapon obsessed kunoichi all but ordered the lazy boy to lead them to the couple. Kakashi had attempted to make another sneaky escape but was tripped over by an over enthusiastic Anko, who had invited herself to the impromptu spying sessions after nearly pissing herself from laughing too hard at Kakashi, with Genma cackling over her shoulder.

Kakashi had expected to find the two genins in about ten minutes, maybe fifteen if they managed to cover a surprisingly large amount of ground in a limited amount of time. 

The odd bunch of jounin and genin spent nearly an hour wandering around Konoha, with no pink blob or black bowlcut in sight. 

In hindsight, it should've been obvious from the start that Asuma's brats were tricking them; the Nara boy didn't offer up that much of a complaint when Gai's hellions ordered him around, Blondie spent the entire time cozying up to Kurenai and Anko, and the Akimichi offered up date-place suggestions that didn't all include restaurants. 

Even his cute little genin had caught on, Sasuke taking a break from shoving his nose up in the sky to grace Kakashi and the rest of his group with his thrilling presence and argue with Naruto if ramen is a luxury plate or not. Kakashi genuinely didn't know if Naruto had been playing along or just extremely passionate about ramen, but knowing the blond boy it was probably the latter. A traitorous part of him pointed out the glaring similarities between Naruto and Kushina, but Kakashi shoved down that thought and set it on fire before he went down that hole. 

In the end, it was the two-bunned brat from Gai's team that caught on to the fact that they were being lead on a wild goose chase. The slightly terrifying genin spent a good amount of time harassing Asuma's team for tricking them. Blondie only sniffed haughtily and told bun girl to be smarter next time, Sasuke's trademark sneer looming over her shoulder. 

Kakashi watched in mild interest as Hayate intervened and tried to stop an all out brawl between the two kunoichi. The Hyuuga finally decided to graciously offer a solution - Kakashi was seeing too many similarities between him and Sasuke, he was half tempted to lock both of them in a room and see what happens - and activate his byakugan to spot Sakura and Lee. 

Then they were off again, genins squabbling and leading the way while Kakashi tried and failed to slink away. Genma suddenly spoke up, chewing the senbon in his mouth as he turned to face Kurenai. 

"Hey, you were looking kinda amused the whole time? Did ya know we were being played like a fiddle by a genin?" 

Up front, Blondie snorted and paused her rant to her teammates, raising an impassive eyebrow at Genma, "No, I played you like the cheap Kazoo you are,"

Anko and Hayate wheezed in unison while Genma sputtered and Asuma laughed, clapping Genma hard on his shoulder. Kurenai and Kakashi let out a synchronized snort as Genma chewed viciously on his senbon. 

"To answer your question," Kurenai started in an attempt to dissuade Genma from stabbing a preteen, "To an extent, I did. I am training a tracking team after all, but I wanted to give Gai and Kakashi's genins some privacy." 

Anko pouted as she draped herself over Genma, snatching one of his senbons from his pocket and twirling it in her mouth, "Privacy is a construct, lets spy on some toddlers. Oi, Hyuuga, you catch anything on that GPS?" 

Kakashi caught a flicker of offense in the Hyuuga's pale eyes before they returned to his normally passive stare and stiffly told Anko that they were getting close. A grudging respect for authority? Kakashi has got to know what Gai feeds his brats; his seem to be actively plotting against him the whole time. Even rule-abiding Sakura was down to drop kick him on a good day. 

The mere thought thought of his pastel colored genin seemed to remind the universe of its goal to constantly torment Kakashi, because not a minute sooner did Hyuuga speak up again and point towards one of the lakes of a training ground. 

Kakashi was unceremoniously shoved into a bush by an over enthusiastic Gai, who was practically squeezing him to death. 

He once again bemoaned at the fact that no matter what he did, he couldn't escape this hell that his cute little genin imposed upon him. Kakashi glanced lazily at Lee and Sakura; Sakura was gazing intently at Lee as he danced on the surface of the water. Occasionally, Sakura would dip her feet and attempt to do the same but would sink down to ankle level, frustration clear on her face as she tried again. 

Kakashi was snapped out of his observation when he was met with the dual glares of Sasuke and Naruto.

"Kaka-sensei!! You didn't teach us how to do that!! What the hell!" 

Sasuke rolled his eyes and elbowed Naruto, "It's called water walking, dobe. But you're right; when were you going to teach us that sensei?"

Kakashi crinkled his eyes as he tubbed his neck, eyes darting towards the rest of the jounins, who were just openly laughing at him the traitors, as he desperately tried to find a way to tell two training obsessed preteens that he had no intention of doing that. 

Thankfully, he was rescued by the Akimichi boy who had a thoughtful face on as he observed Sakura and Lee, munching on his chips. "It doesn't seem that hard though; look, Sakura looks like she just figured it out," 

Kakashi nearly gave himself whiplash as he spun his head around, the action mimicked by all the other jounins as they gazed in disbelief at Sakura's shaking form over the surface of the water, expression triumphant as Lee slipped and fell into the water from his shock. 

He was followed by Sakura as her concentration seemingly broke when she laughed at his soaked form. Kakashi, on any other day, would inwardly die at the cuteness of his tiny genin. Now, he might actually die from stress; one and a half geniuses with crazy chakra reserves were already too much, but adding in prodigious chakra control would gray his already pale hair. And wasn't that a surprise, a clanless genin gifted with chakra control. 

Kakashi was feeling the beginnings of shock take hold of him; out of all his students, he didn't expect Sakura to shine through. He had assumed that the tree walking success during wave was just a fluke, a lucky accident that he easily brushed off in favor of the two other boys. That had apparently been his first mistake, and Kakashi felt a twinge of guilt at brushing off his student so much to the point she'd seek help from another fellow genin. 

Kakashi watched as Sakura braved the water again, this time with Lee hovering over her and shouting encouragements. He was doomed. 

Kakashi ignored Naruto's whining and Blondie's nagging at Asuma to teach her how to water walk, yammering something about rivals that Kakashi just knows will bite him in the ass later on. Genma let out a low whistle while Anko started laughing hysterically, leaning on an uncharacteristically stoic Asuma who was stroking his beard thoughtfully. Kurenai just burned a hole at the ground with a calculating look, and Kakashi winced at the rigorous training she'd undoubtedly inflict upon her team. Gai grabbed his hands and yelled about the overflowing fountain of youth, tears leaking from his calculating eyes. 

Kakashi was definitely doomed. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hope u guys enjoyed the chapter!! its a bit short but i had fun writing it. i love writing kakashi's pov he's always suffering lmaooo. idk if i managed to express this in the chapter but i love kurenai and think that she's the Absolute Shit and a wonderful mother figure for hinata. i also love referencing memes when i write it really help u out when ur stumped and cant figure put a way to word something! just slap a joke over it! the internet is a bag of trash that gets recycled every hot minute so go copy that funny one liner u saw on pinterest.  
> on another note, i went to the dentist and apparently i have 6 cavities??? i think its from the excess fluff i stuff in here but it also might be my crippling pepsi addiction.  
> oh and to clear something up that occurred to me while writing this, i believe that water walking is the difficult level of tree walking so takes much more time. i think the reason why naruto caught on v quickly after pervy sage fixed his seal is because he's been trying to do it for a lot of time with a large amount of chakra so it would be easier once his seal was fixed.  
> anyways, after the date thing i think id like to go on a more montage-y pace up until the chuunin exams.  
> OH and i found this DELIGHTFUL fanart on tumblr!! it literally was the vibe i was going for i gasped out loud when i saw it!! here's the link if u guys wanna check it out.  
> https://lavasplashin.tumblr.com/post/176250457689/some-leesaku-first-date-sketches


	13. is that a stress induced ulcer from not knowing how to teach your students in your pants or are you just happy to see me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> me: sorry guys i have exams i wont be able to update :(((  
> also me: lmaoajdjdjsja studying??? hahahahahdjd funny joke go back to fanfiction dummy  
> (ignore that i wrote this instead of studying for my business mock)  
> anyways chapter thirteen!! with an actual title!! im p proud of this one folks ngl lmao. thirteen is also coincidentally my current favorite number after 64 bc its the name of a rly neat prohero in bnha!! i really enjoyed writing this chapter!! ive noticed that i wasn't really happy with the last two chapters and it's probably bc i didn't enjoy writing them lmao so il glad i could find enjoyment in writing again!

Iruka hummed to himself as he bustled around his kitchen, picking up stray chopsticks and plates and dumping them into the sink. It was a beautiful Sunday morning; the sky was clear, birds were chirping, the neighbor's cat was softly padding across the roof, the weather was nice, and there were no tiny children armed with weapons to test Iruka's patience. Iruka happily put on his gloves and daydreamed about the heavenly lazy day he planned to have. A perfect ending to this blessedly quiet week, except for Naruto's visit yesterday, but Iruka would gladly go deaf for the blond boy. 

His mood was soured, however, when he suddenly sensed a presence just outside his window. The one exactly in front of his face. The beautiful window with the nice weather and lack of children. Or so he thought. 

Iruka huffed as he tore off his gloves and grabbed the sud covered chopsticks he was cleaning, fully intending on giving whatever student - probably Konohamaru, lord knows he looks up to Naruto a bit too much - a jab for completely dishonoring Iruka's teachings with that atrocious attempt at windowsill lurking. Also ruining his children-free day. 

Iruka wrenched open the windows and twisted so he could basically sitin his sink, water be damned. His arm quickly darted and grabbed the offenders foot and yanked to pull them right into his lap. Iruka heard a high pitched yelp that confirmed that this was one of his terrible students. Iruka jumped off his sink and jabbed the brat between their ribs with the chopsticks before placed the abnormally long child behind him - they grow up so fast - as he snapped his gloves back on and went back to his dishes. 

"Now, I don't know who exactly decided to bother me on my free day - my free day!- but I'll overlook it because you are in dire need of some remedial classes young man! Or woman!" 

"Or student?" Iruka almost stopped his lecture at the meek tone, although the deeper than expected voice kind of threw him off - they really do grow up too fast - and nodded sharply before continuing on. 

"Or student!" 

Iruka felt the telltale fidget of a desperate student looking for a way out of a lecture and held his hand up to stop the expected complaint. 

"I appreciate my students trying to implement and improve their skills, but that was a very lacking performance. No chakra hiding, complete lack of stealth, and I even heard a couple of tiles being stepped on! I did pass that off as the neighbor's cat but you should be more careful in unknown territory! What do you have to say for yourself?" 

Iruka finally finished his lecture, which covered his points magnificently if he were to be honest, and spun on his heel expectantly, eyes fixed at the average height of a 12 year old's eyes. 

Iruka was not met by the sight of trembling pudgy cheeks - not that he'd fall for that, children are cruel and would step on your kidneys if it meant more break time - but by a green flack jacket. Iruka felt a sense of foreboding as his eyes traveled upwards to meet the equally stunned eye of one Hatake Kakashi. 

Iruka had fucked up. 

He didn't really interact with Kakashi outside of yelling at him at the mission desk for his lousy handwriting and recently stalking him to see what Naruto's sensei does during the day. Apparently, not much other than blatantly reading porn and being a general annoyance. Still, shit's embarrassing, they have mutual friends and Iruka will never hear the end of this from Anko. 

Both men stared at each other for an immeasurable amount of time, Kakashi clutching his ribs from where Iruka had jabbed him, while Iruka himself had one hand on his hip while the other held up another pair of sud covered chopsticks threateningly. 

Iruka was the first one to recover, having years of experience of saying dumb shit in front of impressionable children that repeat everything they hear with no filter. He was smooth when it's required and has talked his way out of being fired numerous times at parent-teacher meetings. He could totally do this. 

"Aah, Kakashi-san, you're not one of my students," 

Well, there goes the rest of Iruka's lifetime. He'll simply have to die right now, having lectured a wholeass jounin on stealth while clad in matching pink gloves and apron. Even the giant shuriken Mitsuki threw at his back wasn't as painful as this. 

"That I am not. Nice chopsticks," 

Iruka glanced at the still threateningly held chopsticks in his hand and failed to resist the urge to smile softly. The chopsticks were an ugly bright orange with green frogs at the handle of them and Iruka almost broke his wrist when he and another shinobi got into a bit of a spat at 3am for them. But Iruka was nothing if persistent and walked out of that grocery store with a twisted ankle for his troubles; shinobi don't take too kindly to other people standing in the way of their eccentricities. The limp back home was worth it when Iruka saw Naruto's face light up when he brandished his spoils of war. 

Iruka snapped out of his trip down memory lane and cleared his throat awkwardly, hoping he could somehow cover up the way he'd been smiling like an idiot for a solid minute. 

"Ah, thank you. They're a gift for Naruto, but since he ends up at my apartment most nights he just decided to keep them here. Speaking of Naruto, did anything happen? Most jounin-sensei's don't lurk around at an academy teacher's windowsill in their free time. Oh, and sorry for mildly stabbing you." 

Iruka smiled awkwardly as his hands twitched to his head, desperately wanting to succumb to his nervous habit of tightening his ponytail. His friends call it an early grave for his hairline but Iruka just labels it as an alternative to bashing his head into a wall. Alas, his signature high ponytail was forsaken in favor of a low ponytail at his nape. 

"And assuming I was a twelve year old, you really do know how to flatter a man, sensei. What would your precious students think of their sensei not being able to tell the difference between man handling a child and an adult?"

Iruka felt his eye twitch as Kakashi tutted and shook his head disapprovingly. He fought down the traitorous blush threatening his cheeks and huffed as he turned back to his dishes. 

"They would think that I'm very cool for being able to restrain a jounin. Now, did you need something from me, Kakashi-san? Or are you going to dodge my question again?" 

Iruka finished scrubbing the hideous chopsticks and carefully placed them on the drying rack next to the mug that Naruto gifted him, the words BEST SENSEI EVER MUG a bright neon blue on the yellow background. It was his favorite mug. 

Iruka waited patiently for Kakashi to speak up, but sensed the man was more troubled than he let on when Iruka was halfway through scrubbing an annoying curry stain off his pot; a result from one of his many cooking failures in an attempt to shove something edible and nutritious down Naruto's throat that wasn't ramen. 

Iruka sighed and took off his gloves, turning around to face the jounin once again, and wasn't surprised to see him awkwardly hover in the exact same position even though five minutes have already passed. He moved towards the kitchen table, a cramped wooden mess that had way too many scratches and ink stains from Iruka's students during his tutoring sessions, and gestured for Kakashi to sit down with him.

When both men settled down, Iruka motioned for Kakashi to enlighten him with whatever was burdening him, no doubt something related to the whole jounin-sensei thing if he sought out Iruka of all people. Kakashi seemed to be a bit put off by him acting like nothing was odd about this, but Iruka was friends with Anko and if he didn't get used to her barging in the middle of the night with a new life crisis then he would've gone insane a long time ago. 

Kakashi hesitated for a while and Iruka ignored the regular background urging to bang his head on the table that accompanied teaching children and instead took it upon himself to start the conversation. 

"Have you been struggling with your team? I'm aware that this is your first genin team and it's natural to face some difficulties," Dealing with first time teachers is ironically the same as dealing with children; first you have to validate them, and then you have to fix their entire execution without making them feel dumb. 

Kakashi stiffly nodded and Iruka could feel the frustration radiating off the man. If he were any other person, Iruka might have felt bad, but he was team 7's former sensei and he had to deal with Sasuke's understandable yet still annoying brooding, Sakura's temper tantrums and fangirling, and Naruto's general presence in his classroom for six years. The only thing Iruka was feeling right now was vindictiveness and slight pride for his little hellions for being able to ruin a man. 

"There's nothing to be alarmed or ashamed at, teaching isn't the easiest job. Is it Naruto who you're struggling with?" 

Naruto had never been able to pay attention during his classes and had way too large chakra reserves to properly execute most of the academy jutsu, and if it weren't for stupid clan politics Iruka would've offered after school practice. Unfortunately, Iruka had no political standing and couldn't affect the jinchuuriki's education any more than he already does. So when Kakashi shook his head Iruka bloomed with pride and relief that Naruto was flourishing outside the classroom environment. 

"That's wonderful to hear! So, I'm assuming it's Sasuke? He's a bit difficult but can be reached easily-" 

"Ah, no not him either," Kakashi shook he head as he interrupted Iruka, but Iruka was too busy wondering how one person could fuck up that easily; the only person left was Sakura. 

"Sakura," Iruka enunciated slowly, "Sakura, top of the class, Sakura?" 

Kakashi nodded miserably as he splayed his hands on the table and stared at them. "I think I might be, neglecting her, in a sense," 

Iruka felt the approach of a pounding headache and silently mourned his lost lazy day. "Let me guess; you saw her infatuation with Sasuke and wrote her off as a deadweight fangirl who would never get past chuunin?"

Kakashi nodded again, the same downcast expression on his face - or eye in his case. 

"And now you don't know what to do when she proved to be a prodigy in chakra control and got over her crush on Sasuke after going on a date with Lee?" 

Kakashi sighed and went to nod again but stopped when Iruka's statement finally registered. 

"How'd you know? No wait, it was probably Kotetsu or Anko telling you all about my misery," 

Iruka sent Kakashi an unimpressed look, "No, it was Naruto. He came over yesterday and told me all about it; the dress Sakura wore, the dango shop, and the water-walking." 

Naruto had looked so happy yesterday when he told Iruka about his adventures. Iruka had expected him to be dejected that Sakura was dating someone else, but when he brought it up Naruto had grown serious and lectured Iruka about respecting people. He had been so passionate about it, waving his hand just like Iruka did and he regretted not having a camera with him. _Besides_ , Naruto said with his mouth full of ramen and tiny feet kicking from his stool, _I'd rather have a friend than a person to nag on._

Iruka watched with amusement as Kakashi's head fell on the table with a thunk, the man's shoulder sagging dejectedly. 

"How do you it?" the infamous Copy-nin said with a whine, "How do you keep up with so many brats?" 

Iruka huffed out a laugh; three kids were nothing, he had been teaching 20 kids for nearly 6 years and, if you're counting, the countless classes he permanently subs for due to the lack of academy teacher shinobi. His classes also boasted the highest amount of graduates. It would seem a lot, but Iruka triesremembers everything about his students. Ino and her dejection over her ruined friendship with Sakura - and Iruka had been thrilled when he heard from Naruto that they had made up - as well as her desperate need to be seen as more than part of the Ino-Shika-Cho. Chouji, who hides his insecurities about his weight and clan techniques, and Shikamaru's laziness disguising his fear of failure. 

Hinata and Kiba, who share much more in common than they would think, both feeling overshadowed by their clan - Hinata with her older cousin and Kiba with his clan heir older sister. 

Shino and Sakura who share the same shyness, but Shino didn't have an Ino to draw him out of his shell. Iruka had encouraged the placement of team eight; with Kiba's enthusiasm rubbing off of him and Hinata, doubled with Kurenai's soft but firm assurance, Shino was sure to form some friends. 

Perhaps the trickiest were Sasuke and Naruto, but Iruka had been able to respond to Naruto's calls for acknowledgement, albeit a bit too late for his tastes. Sasuke was a whole can of worms Iruka hadn't been able to open, not with the walls the boy had up, and he had hoped that his team placement with Naruto would brighten his life slightly. But the young Uchiha had his tells, and after close scrutiny it was apparent that all the boy wanted was a friend. 

Iruka smiled and fiddled with the end of his ponytail, "I think," and Kakashi brought his head up at his fond tone, "that it's a matter of priority; I want to see my students flourish into the best people they can. What are you looking forward to seeing in your students, Kakashi-san?" 

Kakashi floundered for a second, clearly not expecting that question, before humming thoughtfully. 

"I want to see them protect each other, no matter what." 

Iruka smiled at his statement and Kakashi returned it with an eye-smile of his own. 

"Now, let's talk about your teaching methods!" 

Kakashi blinked at Iruka's change in tone, " Teaching... methods?" 

"Of course, of course! Every student learns differently and needs different types of feedback! Take your team for example; Naruto and Sakura both thrive off of positive feedback, but Sakura requires a more theory-inclined explanation while Naruto works best by demonstration. Sasuke doesn't really need encouragement or praise, but don't completely forsake it! Learning a difficult new jutsu shouldn't be brushed off and you should validate him, just in a timely manner," 

Kakashi looked a bit taken aback by Iruka's explanation and appeared to be reaching for a notebook to write all of this down. 

"And what about your teaching plan? Do you have a schedule? A game-plan?" 

Iruka almost laughed at Kakashi's lost expression. The birds were chirping outside and the weather was nice, maybe it wouldn't be children free or lazy day off, but Iruka felt like he would enjoy today. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sooo what did yall think?? i love iruka he's one of my comfort characters!! also one ive been DYING to introduce!! i wanted to show how much time iruka and naruto spent together by showing all the random nicknacks they have for each other!! i also love iruka and kakashi's dynamics and how most of their scenes are just them being like 🥰❤️✨ over naruto or 👺🗡💣 over naruto's safety. im 1028381929% sure that iruka would love to throw hands w multiple clans for their treatment of their kids but cant bc of Politics and just resigns himself to trying to assign them to the best genin teams for them.


	14. *snap* i think i just broke something - wait no that's just my spine

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ayyoo whats up yall. its been nearly two weeks whew. apologies for the inactivity i actually posted a shitty bnha oneshot last week and my monkey brain thought i updated this fic lmao. anyways im doing those oct/nov exams i mentioned a while back so as a result this chapter was oddly easy to write at the beginning but a pain to end. hope u guys enjoy it :)

Kakashi groaned as he flopped onto one of the couches in the jounin lounge room and pressed his face into the cushions, ignoring the snort above him from- probably another jounin coming to torment him with their genin-less lives. Going to Iruka-sensei turned out to be a great idea after the mild embarrassment of being mistaken for a twelve year old but Kakashi felt like he could actually do this teaching thing. 

Of course that's only if his body decided to cooperate with him; seriously, you spend on night on your floor because getting changed and into your bed was too much work and suddenly you have scoliosis and a 50 year history of back pain. 

Kakashi groaned again and shoved a pillow over his head when the mysterious snickering above him got too loud. 

"If you're gonna make fun of my misery then at least be quiet about it. I'm a poor man suffering -" 

Whatever muffled complaint Kakashi was going to whine about was cut off when an unknown weight made itself at home on Kakashi's poor abused back. He let out a quiet 'oof' and had a weird sense of deja vu from when Asuma had done the same thing last week. 

But the weight on his back was too light to be Asuma - Kakashi didn't lie when he said Asuma had gained a couple of kilos, he should really watch his barbecue intake - and far too prickly. Genma or Anko then, both are paranoid enough to shove senbon in their underwear, but Genma had a much flatter ass that the one making itself comfortable on Kakashi's spine. 

"Finally figured it out genius? You're right though; my ass is definitely better than Genma's,"

Damn it he was thinking out loud again.

"You are," Anko provided helpfully. 

The insane woman who Kakashi was convinced was just a bunch of snakes shoved into a trench coat jumped up and down a bit on Kakashi and laughed maniacally while he reviewed all his life mistakes leading to this moment for the third time this week. He was just about to give up on today and not show up to his genin's training before he heard the telltale sound of Genma's hyena laughter and Kurenai's light giggles. 

Kakashi felt dread pool into his stomach and broke into cold sweat. He suddenly remembered why he doesn't frequent the jounin lounge; every week the jounin-senseis like to gather around to brag about their genins improvement and pass it off as progress report. Kakashi knew better though, Gai just wants to wax poetry about his pseudo-son, mildy terrifying preteen kuniochi, and prodigy Hyuuga while Kurenai darkly plotted the murder of Hyuuga Hiashi. The only one Kakashi could slightly relate to was Asuma and his complaints about his lazy clan kids but he had the Ino-Shika-Cho, there wasn't much he could teach them that their clans hadn't. 

Kakashi quickly extracted himself from under Anko's ruthless bouncing - one day he was going to dress up as one of those dancing balloons and see if people notice the difference, far too many have taken up residence on Kakashi's poor non-bouncable bones - and threw her hazardously at the group of jounins. He dashed to the open window and was just about to pull off a successful escape before a hand grabbed hold of his hair and yanked him back. 

"Not today scarecrow! You're joining is whether you like it or not!" 

Kakashi attempted to wiggle out of Raidō's iron grip but quickly gave up and slumped over in defeat; if Raidō wanted to drag him he's going to make it as uncomfortable as he can for the both of them. 

"Careful with that Raidō, Kakashi-jiji is having a bad back day," Anko snarked from her position on Kurenai's lap. Kakashi would eat his own mask if she wasn't doing that just to see Asuma's face glow a particular shade of purple. 

"Ugh," was Kakashi's eloquent response as he was unceremoniously dumped on the couch he was just tragically bemoaning his life on three minutes ago. Fascinating how time flies, really. 

For a second it was blissfully silent as everyone shuffled around, well not silent with the occasional threat of murder when an elbow strayed too close, and Kakashi was beginning to hope that he was mistaken and there was no genin brag session this week. His hopes were dashed away as Gai finally settled and went into a detailed explanation of how proud he was of Neji - Hyuuga brat? - and his progress with his family kekkai genkai - yeah Hyuuga brat. 

It was like a dam had broken open,and soon enough Kurenai had Asuma, Anko, and Raidō transfixed as she laid out an elaborate and oddly specific plot to frame Hyuuga Hiashi - ah so she had given up on murder- and get away with adopting his daughter - wait, no she just doesn't want to traumatize her genin. 

A shame, Kakashi always thought trauma built character. No better way to form an instinct for danger like walking on your father committing suicide. 

When he'd said as much out loud he was met with several approving nods, although they were from Anko and Hayate; a slightly manic woman who was trained by one of the sannin that turned traitor and a chronically ill person who refuses to stop taking mission unless unable to walk and dating an ANBU. Aside from the rest of the lounge throwing him weird and alarmed looks that promised later confrontation, it was a good enough contribution that Kakashi could safely say he could stay silent for the rest of the discussion and simply lurk. 

That would've been the case if Gai hadn't loudly praised Kakashi's pink little genin after harassing Kotetsu for nearly ten minutes to teach Tenten - oddly cute name for a gremlin who almost took out Gai's balls when he first started meeting up with his mini version - how to wield some ancient weapon nobody used anymore. 

Kakashi shrunk in his seat as everyone swiveled around to face him, he really did not want to talk about this. 

"Oh yeah, you got the jinchūriki, the last Uchiha, and a chakra-control freak," Genma counted off his fingers and Kakashi felt the immense urge to bite them off, why do they have to talk about this right now? Must the world know he's incompetent? Isn't internal struggle enough? 

Apparently not. 

But wait, Kurenai looked as if she was going to say something, is the universe finally taking mercy on him? Are the stars aligning for him?

"I wish one of my students had a bit of chakra control, not that I don't like my students; Hinata, Shino, Kiba, and Akamaru are all angels -" 

A collective snort of disbelief went around at that; the Hyuuga heir might be shy and Aburames generally keep to themselves but adding an Inuzuka was just asking for trouble, they tend to bring out the worst in people in the name of fun. 

"- they really are! But I can't teach genjutsu without having to cover chakra control first," 

Kakashi was a bit surprised at that; he didn't expect Kurenai to actually pass on one of her skill to her genin when both of them were clan heirs and one was second born to the clan head. He felt some ideas bumping around in his head as he assessed his team again and was just about to form some half assed plan before he was once again put on the spot by his own comrades, the traitors. 

"So what're you planning for them? Got any exciting stories? Maybe some prodigy anecdotes?" 

Kakashi stared at the dark smudge on Asuma's beard as he smirked, probably a cigarette stain, and thought back to his teams horribly awkward interactions this past week. It seems that without having Sakura act as mediator or referee between Naruto and Sasuke they've all been thrown off kilter trying to find their new dynamics. Which was great and all but if Kakashi has to witness another occasion of Sakura and Sasuke both having an internal crisis after she hit his head for being annoying while Naruto howled in the background he's sure he will pass away. 

Kakashi scratched his neck as an attempt to pass off as nonchalant as he tried to convey that he didn't exactly teach shit to anyone. 

"Maah, you know how it is with teaching," That's it, he was defecting to Suna and changing his name. 

"You have no idea what you're doing, do you?" 

Kakashi was about to deny that; he used to have no idea what he was doing, now he just has a few ideas thank you very much Raidō, but was cut off by Hayate. 

"Ah, knowing Kakashi he probably thought pink wasn't a violent color and moved on to the other genins," 

Another round of snorts and Kakashi weakly laughed along and hoped that they would change the subject. The laughter was cut off abruptly at Kakashi's weak attempt to throw them off his trail and everybody turned to face him once again. 

"Kakashi, please tell me you didn't actually ignore one of your student because she's pink," Kakashi didn't like Kurenai's strained voice, not one bit, and attempted to play it safe. 

"Maah, of course not," Kurenai relaxed minutely at that and Kakashi did an internal happy tap dance; no more people up in his unprofessional business, "we all know how terrifying pink can be, Iruka-sensei did well to educate us,"

Perfect response; evade the question and bring up old trauma. If the rest of the pseudo meeting continued like this Kakashi could safely say that he would reach his genins meetup place only 3 hours late with least amount of his incompetence leaking out. 

Unfortunately, Hayate seemed to have developed a skill of mind reading overnight, or discovered some long lost connection to the Yamanaka clan, as he narrowed his eyes and jabbed a finger in Kakashi's direction. 

"You're avoiding the question! You did ignore your pinky brat!" 

A series of overdramatic gasps were let out, Kakashi included, followed by Hayate's trademark cough. 

"Me? Bias? How could you accuse me of such thing!"

"Avoiding the question again! You're probably only here to be as late as possible to your genin training time!"

Instead of another round of gasps, Kurenai and Asuma started loudly complaining while Raidō stared disappointedly at Kakashi. 

"Are you kidding me? You know how many leaf exercises I have overseen? How many trees Kiba has completely demolished? We'll never master waterwalking at this rate! Not to mention Hinata and Shino's general dislike of speaking. I swear Kakashi I will steal that pink girl from under you and keep her with me until you learn how to function properly as a teacher," 

"Kakashi you have three training junkies on your team and you're here procrastinating? Do you know how much money I've spent on barbecue alone trying to convince Chouji to train? And don't get me started on Ino and Shikamaru! At least Ino has her weird rivalry with your brat going on but that Nara boy is going to be the death of me," 

"Uhh," Kakashi didn't exactly know how to respond to any of that and elected to simply not.

"No, never mind, you need to get out of here! Go! You have a team to train! Shoo!" 

And thus Kakashi was unceremoniously shoved out of the jounin lounge by a raving Asuma and Kurenai. Kakashi glanced at the firmly shut door in bemusement and tried to wander down to the little red bridge that team seven claimed as an unofficial meeting place as casually as he could. 

Ugh, looks like he actually has to do this teaching thing. Well, guess his demon brats were learning water walking today. 

(On the other side of the village, nearly two hours later, Kakashi would gleefully wonder why he didn't take up the teaching thing sooner as he watched Naruto almost drown Sakura and Sasuke for the fifth time) 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so what do u guys think!!!  
> personally not a fan of this one folks lmaoo like i think i finally get why animes and manga have filer episodes/chapters sometimes that dumb bitvh disease strikes u from nowhere. i kinda only uploaded this to keep the fic going because i know ill drop this if i don't regularly update it and i dont want to discontinue this so we must march on.  
> ive reverted to my habit of oh-shit-i-got-nothing-planned-kakashi-pov-time in these trying times and came to the shocking and painful realization that this absolute wreck of a man is one of my comfort characters 😔✌️.  
> i love writing jounin interactions i think theyre v funny and anko is always a delight to write. i also didn't want to explain team sevens's dynamics in detail because even tho im literally on my 14th chapter of this it has occurred to me that i hate writing as much as a i enjoy it ❤️.  
> it took all my willpower not to just say 'fuck it' and write a kurenai pov that focused on team 8 but i must save the best for the last.  
> kakashi is definitely that older brother who whines all the way to the arcade u want to go to and then wipes u out in every single game yall play and wins the toy u specifically want.


	15. the inherent symbolism of cutting your hair

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yknow a ten day break isn't bad im still doing the regular update shit. to whoever i told i would be updating in a day or two three days ago - i apologize the recent hq episode dropped yesterday and it was a tanaka centric episode i almost died from heart palpitations from how much i love that man. also horikoshi kept dropping banger chapters.  
> also we're so close to 10k hits! and 200 bookmarks!! hello new readers!! hello old ones!! hope u all enjoy!!

Sakura's eye twitched for what seemed to be the thirteenth time this evening, her hands carefully floating in the water as she resisted the urge to choke her teammates while they were already partially drowning. 

Sakura had been thrilled when Kakashi-sensei showed up to training today, with actual plans!! For training!! And when he said they were going to practice waterwalking she felt even more excited; she already knew how to do that! She couldn't wait to rub that in Naruto and Sasuke's faces. 

Oh and how infuriated they were when she was the only one able to stand steadily on the surface of the water. Usually, the sight of Sasuke's glowering face would leave her slightly scared and scrambling to make it up for him but she had spent a week arguing him during all their D-ranks, his glare had lost all its affect on her, so she just laughed at him and kicked some water in his face. 

Take that Uchiha prodigy, she had cackled as he and Naruto immediately sunk into the water after Kakashi-sensei's less that stellar explanation, abnormally large chakra stores won't help either of you now. 

But what she originally thought to be a reprieve from her usual struggle with physical training turned out to be another plot from her evil evil sensei. Even now, while he was hiding in the blissful shade of a nearby tree as she burned under the sun, Sakura could practically smell his glee; somehow Kakashi-sensei knew of her waterwalking sessions with Lee and placed the responsibility of teaching Naruto and Sasuke on her poor sunburnt shoulders.

A part of her mourned the loss of her perfectly pale skin, but it was overtaken by the bigger part who was filled with petty spite and the urge to dump a bucket of water of her sensei's head. 

"Stupid, lazy sensei," Sakura grumbled as she sunk deeper into the water. She wriggled a bit to sink completely and finally managed to wrangle out of Naruto's death grip and swum a little bit further away from her teammates before resurfacing and propping herself on shaky legs. 

Maybe if she passed out from chakra exhaustion, Sakura mused as Sasuke caused a large pillar of steam to erupt when he finally lost his temper and tried to use a fire jutsu, Kakashi-sensei would let her go home. 

Sakura sighed again as she wrung her sopping wet mesh shirt, she had taken off her normal shirt in a moment of weakness against the sun, and readjusted her ponytail. She had mournfully let go of her usual dress and shorts outfit after her mother threatened to take away her Lee privileges if she kept coming back home with ripped skirts and muddy shorts, a result of their less than conventional dates. Sakura, red faced and flustered, didn't want to lose her Lee privileges so she had to go with the less fashionable pants and shirt combo. 

Lee still said you still look beautiful though, a giddy part of her reminded, and Sakura felt a traitorous blush rush to her cheeks. 

"Oi, Sakura-chan! Can you explain the chakra theory again? Please? Oh your face is red, d'you have a sunburn? You'll get a really bad burn if you don't wear sunscreen, dattebayo!" 

Sakura shot a nasty glare towards Naruto, not because of anything he said, but because of his current choice of clothes. Or lack thereof. While she and Sasuke opted to take off their shirts and stay in their mesh shirts, Naruto had over enthusiastically stripped down to his underwear. 

"Baka!" Sakura huffed as she tentatively stomped towards the two sad blobs representing her teammates, "The only one getting a sunburn is you. Didn't anyone tell you it's rude to strip in front of a lady?" 

Naruto squinted as he swiveled his head around, "What lady? Nobody's here except for us, dattebayo," 

Naruto squealed as he bobbed underwater to avoid Sakura's fist while Sasuke snorted. Sakura shrieked again as she dove for Sasuke and took satisfaction in the way his eyes widened slightly in fear. 

"Ah, ah, Sakura-chan this isn't fair! Me 'nd teme can't waterwalk yet" Naruto yelped and clutched onto Sasuke as he re-emerged from the water. 

"Get off of me, deadlast." Naruto and Sasuke's would-be argument was put on hold when Sakura dove for them again. 

"Well then, you better start taking notes!" 

Naruto and Sasuke both hazardously tripped over the water as they ran away from the pink demon they call their teammate. 

"I heard that!" 

Sakura viciously thanked Kakashi-sensei for passing on his habit of thinking out loud to her teammates and sprinted after their wobbling forms. At least, Sakura huffed as she almost lost her concentration trying not to laugh when Naruto fell again, they would slightly get the hang of waterwalking. 

Sakura would've loved to give more chase and catch Naruto and Sasuke; she was gaining ground - or technically water?- on them, but her chakra reserves told a different story and she had to call off their little game of I-promise-I'm-not-laughing-at-you-I'm-chasing-you, you're-doing-great. 

Sakura slowly reduced the flow of chakra to her trembling legs and sunk down to her knees before flopping on her back. Her legs were screaming at her and she could feel the incoming headache from her using up most of her chakra. 

Sasuke and Naruto warily approached her, well Sasuke did while ankle level in the water as Naruto dog paddled his way over to her, and she halfheartedly batted away Naruto's poking fingers. She was flattered that they both thought she was faking her exhaustion and was about to pounce them, but all she wanted to pounce right now was her bed. 

"Sakura-chaan, c'mon training isn't over yet, dattebayo." Naruto whine was accompanied by Sasuke's number six "hn", the you're-a-waste-of-space-get-back-to-training one. 

"Hush, I'm manifesting a two month long mission to Suna for Kakashi-sensei," 

Naruto snorted and floated next to her, "Nah, Suna is too dry for Kaka-sensei. Try Wave instead." 

Sakura idly ran some water over her face before the sun decided to take personal offense to it and fry it, "But Wave has good food, Kakashi-sensei doesn't deserve that." 

Naruto's nose twitched and Sakura immediately thought of Tsunami-san's fish dinners during their disaster C-rank. Both of their stomachs growled in unison, which Sasuke took as an invite to reintroduce himself to the conversation after soundlessly struggling with staying upright during Sakura and Naruto's manifestation session. 

"Maybe if you actually trained instead of reading books all the time, you wouldn't have such abysmal chakra stores." The universe seemed to side with Sakura for once as Sasuke immediately lost his concentration and fell into the water. 

Sakura and Naruto cackled as Sasuke resurfaced, sputtering and shaking his head, and ignored his stink glare. But it didn't seem that Sasuke's motivational speech of the day was coming to an end. 

"All that talk about genjustu and you can't even use a single technique," Okay that one hit a bit too close. 

Sakura scowled as her face turned red again, "Yeah? I don't see you using any fancy techniques either, Mr. Sharingan." 

Naruto paused his defensive speech for Sakura and sniggered as Sasuke's face matched her own infuriated blush. 

"That's now how it works! I've got to unlock another two tomoes -"

"Blah blah, you're just making excuses, teme. At least Sakura-chan is researching, dattebayo," 

Sasuke suddenly dove for Naruto and Sakura with a kunai in his hand. Sakura immediately started channeling chakra again and nimbly jumped on the surface of the water. Naruto, who admittedly had been doing the worst during this exercise, decided that Sakura was the nearest equivalent of a tree and somehow propelled himself upwards and into Sakura's arms with a loud shriek of "FUCK" before Sasuke reached him. 

Sakura grunted as her knees wobbled, straining under the weight of the still cussing Naruto. Naruto turning out to be an enthusiastic swearer was no surprise to anyone on the team, and Sakura was glad he didn't feel the need to censor himself anymore, but right now it was a massive pain to her poor ears. Sakura rejoiced slightly at the fact that Sasuke didn't figure out waterwalking yet but her celebrations were cut short as Sasuke suddenly propped himself up on shaky hands and sloshed through the water, ankle deep, at an alarming speed towards Naruto and Sakura. 

Naruto's cussing turned into incoherent screaming and was accompanied by Sakura's own shrill voice as she adjusted her bridal style grip on Naruto and sprinted away from Sasuke. 

"Did he- did he activate his fucking sharingan?" 

Sakura whipper her head around and was subjected to the frankly terrifying, hunched over figure of Sasuke speed-sliding his way to them, the single tomoe spinning lazily in his red eyes. 

"What the fuck, how is he getting the hang of this so quickly?!" Ah, there was the combined affect of Kakashi-sensei and Naruto's potty mouthes making their appearance in Sakura's speech. Well, it's been a while since her mom grounded her, might as well break that streak. 

Naruto's arms just tightened around Sakura's neck in response, muttering about sharingans and unfair shortcuts, and she wheezed as she ducked left to avoid the sailing kunai Sasuke hurtled at her. 

"Aren't you two eternal rivals?" Sakura shrieked as another kunai sailed terrifyingly close to her ear. "Go fight it out with him or something!" 

"I can't waterwalk yet!" Naruto hollered in a unique display of self awareness. Sakura was almost proud; he did have some semblance of human preservation. "What d'you want me to do, throw rocks at him from the shore? You go fight him! I'm officially extending the rivalry to you, dattebayo!" 

Sakura was torn between yelling about how rivalries don't work that way, idiot and experiencing an odd mixture of being touched yet horrified, before an idea suddenly popped up in her head, and she spun on her heel to face Sasuke. Naruto scrambled to hold on, somehow ending up on her back as his legs squeezed her ribs out of her stomach. 

"Alright, alright, let's settle this like shinobi!" 

Sasuke disregarded her completely and kept running at her, so she muttered a quick apology to a confused Naruto and hurled him towards Sasuke with a determined 'CHA!'. Sasuke's quiet yet somehow pissed off 'oof' was drowned out by Naruto's shrieking and they both toppled into the water. 

"Wait! Wait, hear me out!" Sakura held out her hands in a non threatening manner but nimbly jumped away when Sasuke once again ignored her and tried to stab her, Naruto still struggling in the background. 

"I - Sasuke ouch stop it - I propose a competition," 

Sasuke's eyes narrowed but didn't stop swiping at her with his kunai, which was really rude as Sakura was extremely slower than him even when he was still half submerged in water and kept getting cut. 

"Hn," 

Sakura resisted the urge to scream and instead threw a desperate look at Naruto; she was unfamiliar with this 'hn'. Naruto scowled as he dunked himself again in a failed attempt to prop himself up but pitied her enough to grace her with an answer. 

"It's the 14th; the I'll-hear-you-out-for-now one!"

Sakura almost laughed at Naruto's expertise with dissecting Sasuke-Speech but instead yelped as she ducked underneath Sasuke's kunai.

"Okay, okay how about we have a bit of a genjutsu show-off?" 

Sakura nearly lost her balance as she dodged another stab that never came. Sasuke had stopped trying to turn her into a pin cushion and instead regarded her with a look full of disdain, which she took as invitation to continue. 

"On chapter three of my genjutsu book, the one we read yesterday, there was a section about scent based genjutsu, right? So we both try to put Kaka-sensei under a genjutsu and whoever makes him hungry enough to call off training wins!" 

Naruto, who had finally stopped his attempts to stand on the water and was now floating, seemed to have expended his silence quota for the day. 

"Hey! What about me, dattebayo?"

Sakura snapped her fingers in Naruto's direction and interjected before Sasuke's sneer could evolve into a full on insult. 

"You," and Sakura paused here, scrambling for a way to include Naruto in a way that would leave him satisfied, "are going to judge us, and help us pick a certain smell." 

Naruto squinted his eyes and thought about it for a moment before nodding his head and accepting, but perked up again with another question. 

"What d'you mean, help you guys pick a smell?" 

"What does Kakashi-sensei always eat at the ramen stand?" 

Sakura looked at Sasuke in surprise when they spoke in unison but he didn't spare her a glance. Rude. 

"That's easy, dattebayo! Eggplant ramen." Naruto exclaimed proudly and Sasuke finally looked at her, the same thought running through their heads. 

This dumbass probably has the whole menu memorized. 

"Alright, I agree. If I win you help me with waterwalking."

Sakura rolled her eyes; Sasuke literally could've just asked her but noooo, his precious ego is too big for that. Ugh, she really had no idea how she used to crush on him so bad. 

"Hey! Sakura-chan, you're gonna help me too, right? I hafta know how to waterwalk if I'm gonna be Hokage, dattebayo!"

"Yeah, of course Naruto," Sakura responded absentmindedly as her mind whirled; this was her chance to make Sasuke pay for all his mean comments this past week! "Okay, if I win you - uh- you have to go shopping with me! Actually, with me and Naruto!" 

Sasuke looked as if he was going to be constipated at the thought of a team outing, but Sakura held her ground. Sasuke admittedly, and surprisingly, had the best fashion sense out of all of them and Sakura wanted to show off against Ino. Also, Sakura could probably force Naruto into buying something that isn't neon orange. Really, the only one suffering would be Sasuke and Sakura could live with that. 

Sasuke stiffly agreed, much to the joy of a wheezing Naruto, and all three of them silently edged closer to the shore to get a better view of Kakashi-sensei. 

"I'm going first." Sasuke said snootily and leaned forward a bit, his brow furrowed in concentration. 

Sakura met Naruto's eyes over Sasuke and they both made a face.They tried to hold in their giggles but Sasuke noticed them anyways and jabbed them both in the stomach before returning to his position. 

"You gotta put it on all of us, okay? Naruto can't judge us if you don't," 

Sakura wheezed as she rubbed her side. 

"I know, shut up." 

"Don't forget the eggplant, the eggplant Sasuke," Sakura snorted as Naruto, also rubbing his side, leaned into Sasuke's space and breathed into his ear. 

"I know," Sasuke said, his voice tight with aggravation, and he jabbed them both again in the same spot. "shut up."

Sakura quietly wheezed again but payed close attention to Sasuke as he went through the handsigns of the jutsu. Genjutsu affects the chakra flow in the brain and requires good chakra control, so Sakura was a bit confident in her victory of this bet. It also required the user to have a distinct memory to be able to replicate whatever illusion they're putting their victim under, and team seven had been on so many ramen meetups that Sakura basically snorted the ramen scent, so she wasn't concerned about that either. 

The only thing that worried her was the amount of chakra she had left, the waterwalking exercise really drained her, and if she put too little into the jutsu the aroma would be too faint. 

Sakura's nose twitched as Sasuke's genjutsu was draped over them. It was a bit fuzzy, nowhere near the precise layering of Kakashi-sensei Hell Viewing technique, but still impressive for a first try and with no practical demonstration other than a really bad diagram in her book. 

The ramen scent was thick and made Sakura's mouth water, but there was a weird emphasis on tomatoes? 

Sasuke seemed to notice as well as a light dusting of red appeared on his cheekbones, but before he could correct his mistake Naruto punched his shoulder and cheerfully told him "No redoes, dattebayo!". 

Sasuke sneered but backed down and grumbled at Sakura that it was her turn. 

Sakura took a deep breath and tried to imagine the ramen stand scent as hard as she can. She went through the handsigns and gently layered her chakra over Kakashi-sensei and her teammates. With her current chakra levels she couldn't make it smell like they were seated in the middle of Ichiraku but maybe she could play that to her advantage and instead make it seem like a gentle whiff carried by the breeze. 

Sakura exhaled softly as the jutsu drained the last of her chakra and shared an expectant look with Sasuke at Naruto. 

Naruto crossed his arms and rubbed his chin thoughtfully, "Well, Sasuke-teme had a stronger smell and it was like we were right at Ichiraku's," Sasuke puffed up at the praise, "but minus points for the tomatoes." 

"Sakura-chan's was way weaker, but in a good way!" Naruto hurried to assure her but she just waved at him to continue, "it's like when you catch the smell of ramen when you're taking the long way home after setting off a really awesome prank," 

Well that was a bit specific. 

"I don't care, just say who was better dobe," Sasuke interjected. 

"Hey! I wanna hear the rest of it, stop being rude," Sakura shoved Sasuke's shoulder in annoyance. 

Sasuke rolled his eyes and swatted her head. Sakura decided to take personal offense to that and kicked him in the shin. Sasuke's eyes narrowed and he leaned over to punch her again but she scrambled and dodged. 

Soon they were tumbling around the shore like a bunch of academy students, cussing each other out while Naruto attempted to break them up. 

Sakura would've laughed at the switched roles but she was too busy trying to get Sasuke's hands out of her hair. Somehow he had ended up on top of her with his bony knees digging into her ribs. 

"Stop pulling my hair idiot!" Sakura wildly grabbed for Sasuke and ended up with her hand shoving at his face. Sasuke grunted but didn't stop his attempts to stab her with the kunai in his hand, but was grabbed by Naruto before he could bring it down.

"Stop fighting you dipshits! Kaka-sensei's gonna hear you, dattebayo!"

"Fuck off, deadlast," Sasuke reared his arms back and elbowed Naruto in the gut. 

"Leave Naruto out of this!" Sakura shrieked and kicked Sasuke in the chest, and the results played out in slow motion for all of them. 

One; Sasuke's other hand was still in her hair and was pulling it upwards. 

Two; Sasuke's kunai wielding hand was coming down at her but changed its course when Sakura kicked him. 

Three; Sakura's long soft hair, her joy and pride, was the only acting barrier between her and the knife. 

Silence rang through the shore as all three genin stared at Sakura's limp pink strands getting washed away into the river A part of her laughed at the irony of her hair being cut by the same guy she grew it out for, but the bigger part of her was just in shock. Sakura slowly turned her head to a scoffing Sasuke and felt rage boil inside of her. 

"SASUKE!" 

To be quiet frank, the next three minutes were a bit of a blur for Sakura. All she remembered was her fist colliding with Sasuke's face that somehow devolved into Sakura giving Sasuke's an impromptu trimming of his bangs - they were ugly anyways - and Naruto getting involved after giving up on playing peacemaker. 

Sakura was just about to use one of her precious cut off locks to strangle Naruto before a large hand clamped on to her neck and lifted her off the ground. 

"Maa," Kakashi-sensei asked bemusedly, "what's going on here?" 

Sakura, Sasuke, and Naruto - who were all being carried by Kakashi-sensei by one form or another - all started ranting at the same time. Sakura saw Kakashi-sensei nod and hum along as he trekked outside of the training grounds and waved at fellow shinobi. Normally, she would've been embarrassed being carried around like this, under her sensei's arms like a bag, but she was far too invested in insulting Sasuke and dragging his name through the ground to pay any mind to that. 

"So," Kakashi-sensei interrupted suddenly, which was a shame as Sakura was just getting into the best part of her why-Sasuke-should-be-labeled-a-war-criminal rant, "what I understand is that you had a genjutsu competition that somehow turned into a brawl? That ended up with all of you getting haircuts?"

Sakura craned her neck in surprise, trying to get a good look at Naruto, and yep, right there clinging to Kakashi-sensei's back was a bang-less Naruto. 

"Yes."

"Hn,"

"Yeah, dattebayo."

Kakashi-sensei sighed, "What am I going to do with all of you,". Sakura felt dread pooling into her stomach as she shared frantic looks with her teammates; she can't take another week of D-ranks, not after the first semblance of training they've had in weeks. 

"This is all your fault anyways, Kakashi-sensei," Sakura blurted in a fit of panic. 

"Oh?" Kakashi-sensei raised an eyebrow at her. 

"Tch. Sakura's right, you barely taught us anything and left us alone,"

Sakura beamed at Sasuke from where he was also being carried like a bag on Kakashi-sensei's other hand and he eyed her wearily, but she just waved him off. No hard feelings, she mouthed at him, and was pleased to only be met by a disgruntled eye roll. 

"Yeah! You can't treat your future Hokage like this! I'll tell Iruka-sensei what happened, dattebayo! Didn't you go for him for teaching advice?" 

Sakura perked up at Naruto's loud claim and watched in fascination as the only patch of exposed skin on Kakashi-sensei's face seemed to pale under the threat of Iruka-sensei. Smart man. Still, a part of her felt very warm at the thought of Kakashi-sensei asking for teaching advice, even though he was still bad at it. 

Kakashi-sensei cursed under his breath, "Alright! You brats win, we'll go to Ichiraku since ramen started all this clusterfuck."

Sakura and Naruto cheered while Sasuke only complained a minimal amount. Naruto jumped off Kakashi-sensei's back and started blackmailing him into paying as well, and then raced ahead of them to Ichiraku's. 

Sasuke started squirming in Kakashi-sensei's hold, probably not being able to resist the urge to follow Naruto and beat him to the ramen stand, but Kakashi-sensei kept his firm hold on both of them. 

"Y'know both of your genjutsu weren't half bad," Sasuke immediately stopped struggling and Sakura listened attentively, "I know of a genjutsu master and she could teach you a couple of tricks of you want to," 

Sakura immediately agreed, almost giving herself whiplash from how hard she was nodding, but Sasuke just scoffed and turned his head away. 

"I won't need that. As soon as I unlock my sharingan tomoe's I'll be able to do genjutsu."

"Yeah? And when is that going to be? Face it Sasuke, you can't force your kekkai genkai to upgrade suddenly, you need to hone your other skills." 

Sasuke seemed to consider it for a moment and finally agreed, though he looked like he wanted to do anything but.

Kakashi-sensei's grasp on them finally loosened and Sakura and Sasuke both sprung to their feet. Sasuke immediately chase after Naruto, but Sakura hesitated. Usually she walked with Kakashi-sensei and laughed at their ridiculousness, but she shook her head and ran after them. 

Her usual won't cut it, and she made a promise to Lee; she would be a great shinobi no matter what. 

("Hey, Sakura-chan, you and your Lee-kun kind of match now, dattebayo!" 

"Shut up, Naruto ! Sasuke! Stop laughing this isn't funny-) 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i need to start putting a disclaimer on my chapters - whatever i promised in the comments of previous chapters probably won't be here, i get distracted too easily.  
> i also should put a Lying Bitch disclaimer because i really said w my full chest last chapter that i was too lazy to write team 7 dynamics and then wrote a 4k chapter about team seven dynamics.  
> i am back on my 4 am bullshit so that's probably the reason why ❤️ but i had so much fun with this chapter so idrc.  
> anyways all i have to say rn about sakura and lee is ✨bowlcut buddies✨  
> also sasuke didn't have all his bangs cut off they're just not chin length anymore, think curtain bangs  
> naruto looks like boruto-naruto but only his bangs lmaoo but im torn between making him cut it all short or let all of team seven go through an awkward hair phase.  
> also i love the hc of kakashi refusing to admit he has friends like  
> kakashi: here's the genjutsu master i know of  
> kurenai: kakashi we go out every week  
> kakashi: we're acquaintances  
> kurenai: ive known u since u were six wtf


	16. author's note

hello my dudes. fear not, i am not discontinuing nor abandoning my child (this work lmao) i am just announcing a temporary hiatus

why? you may ask. well, let me let me paint a picture for y'all; it's friday morning and you're watching tiktok as any irresponsible, miniscule attention span ridden gen z teenager would. suddenly, a fly which you had been paranoid about for three minutes zooms in and you fearfully wave it off, however you are a dumbass with butterfingers and your iphone, you entire life contained within a rectangular metal box made by children in sweatshops that makes you want to rebel against capitalism but you base your entire entertainment around it so you can't, goes flying and hits the floor. you are unconcerned as your sister rightfully calls you a dumbass and you laugh it off as you collect your phone. you turn it over to inspect it and aren't surprised to see no clear scratches as you are in possession of an iphone 5s which acts as a direct descendant of the fabled nokia herself. however, as you open your phone, and false relief washes over you at the sight of the stolen fanart background lifted from pinterest, it becomes apparent that your actions have consequences and your touch screen is no longer operational. 

so as you can see, my lovely empathetic readers who are probably praying for a speedy recovery or perhaps new phone for me, i am no longer capable of producing shitty 2k chapters every week or so and have to regrettably actually study for my olevels in three days that i've been halfassing for the past month. if any of you are curious i am typing this on my moms laptop ,which is at 7 percent, in the guest living room so that my sister doesn't make fun of me.

i appreciate your understanding and pray that my parents take pity on me and magically forget about my phone addiction and buy me a new one. 

with love, 

the author 

EDIT : i have found my roots and located my 4s AND a functional charger in my panicked search for another outlet that allows me to ignore my own responsibilities while penelope scott, 100 gecs, mother mother, msi, and mitski play in the background. im not sure but perhaps ive been overdramatic here as i might still be able to update :)

EDIT 2: okay last edit but I actually am typing this from my phone that's right 4s coming in with clutch lmao it's very laggy however BUT it has a killer hello kitty cover so who's the real loser lol. sorry to say that I can't type on this bad boy but I will be lurking and feeding into my newfound jujutsu kaisen obsession. have a fun Halloween y'all and don't forget to social distance and to wear your masks.


	17. himbo explains the inner workings of local emo, next is weather

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey y'all 🌚 sorry for ghosting u guys for a month. to answer any questions; no I did not buy a new phone yet. this chapter is brought to u by my iPhone 4s ✨also my parents kind of hit off w ms rona for a while. dw tho we're gucci now and they both quarantined. hope u guys enjoy this chapter!

Sakura peered over her bowl, trying to appear as innocent as possible. Naruto, who had the tact of an elephant dressed in a tutu that was still better dressed than him, simply leaned over the counter, claiming that Sakura's hair was blocking the view. 

Sakura would've made a snide remark, a jibe perhaps, at Sasuke concerning the state of her hair. Alas, her chance at pissing Sasuke off was shoved aside for the bigger picture right now (opportunity cost people, simple business!) that even Sasuke was invested in. So much that he mirrored Naruto in his position and leaned backwards off the counter in a failed attempt at nonchalance - it would've been more affective if he didn't look like he's doing a DIY scoliosis yoga routine. Still, they had a target and a shared goal. 

Kakashi sensei and his mask. Or hopefully, lack thereof. Any prior disagreements were put on hold for the moment. 

See, there was a certain saying in Konoha; three genin can take on a chuunin, three chuunin can take on a jounin, and three jounin can take on the Hokage. So logically, three genin with perhaps three bowls of ramen worth of money between them (Sasuke doesn't count, he had pulled the trauma card and backed off of funding), seven paper clips, and a baggie of fertilizer ("they're for my potted plants, dattebayo") could definitely unmask one jounin-sensei. 

Konoha also promoted optimism. 

Sakura slurped her bowl obnoxiously again and watched the beautiful sight of her sensei's eye twitching for the seventh time in a row. Naruto crowed to her right and nearly fell off his chair as he vowed revenge; shocked and enraged when she defeated his high score of six eye twitches. On her left, Sasuke pretended to be above such things, but she saw him keep a tally on a scroll. All of this seemed irrelevant to Sakura as she kept her hawk-like gaze at her sensei. 

Kakashi-sensei lowered his book that he wasn't actually reading and Sakura inhaled in shock, therefore almost choking on half her miso ramen. She banged on the table as she struggled to breathe and felt Sasuke and Naruto lean over her to take a better look. Traitors. 

But her teammates were also idiot traitors and soon enough, one of them toppled over the over and sent them all crashing into the floor. Sakura now added bruised ego and ribs to her list of injuries, snugly sitting besides scorched throat and loss of smell. 

Whoever not only taught Naruto how to make chili bombs, but also gave a step by step analysis and tutorial is going to get a very harshly worded letter from her. 

All three members of team seven scrambled to their feet in various states of disarray as they desperately tried to catch a glimpse of Kaka-sensei's face. Their efforts were in vain as they surfaced from underneath the counter, Naruto shoving back coupons in his pants while Sasuke deactivated his sharingan, accompanied by Sakura's lengthy cursing, only to be met by their eye-smiling sensei as he paid their tab and left the ramen stand with a cheerful reminder. 

"Don't forget! Tomorrow is stamina training! Anybody who falls behind gets bitten by my summons!"

"Nooooo, 'ttebayo,"   
"Please not Bull, please not Bull,"  
"My revenge quest suddenly fits two people," 

Kakashi-sensei just laughed at them like the cruel man he is, as Sakura wonders not for the first time, that who ever thought that her sensei would be anywhere near the words 'good teacher' must be smoking something good. 

"Hn. I'm going to train," 

Sakura ignored Naruto's loud complaint and insults at Sasuke and squinted at Sasuke's retreating back as he gloomily sulked away. Something was wrong yet she couldn't quite put her finger on it. Training went by as usual, Sasuke still abided by his strict perfectionist, self set laws, and the average amount of fights between him and Naruto, and recently her and Sasuke, did not fall nor exceed the usual.

Okay, so maybe they all went a bit overboard today and ended up with atrocious haircuts, but Sakura is still not sure what proper etiquette in a rivalry is, so it's probably a normal thing. Still, she thought as she mournfully carded her hand through her choppy hair, it would've been nice to just have come out of that fight with a couple of bruises instead. 

So what's nagging at her? This needs outside opinions. 

"Hey, Naruto?" She nudged at the slurping boy as he grunted and motioned at her to go on, "Do you feel like Sasuke's pissier than usual?" 

Naruto slurped thoughtfully as he considered her question and wow, Sakura totally gets why Kaka-sensei hates that sound so much. 

"Oh yeah definitely, he's more revenge-y than usual but still kinda lowkey about it. 'S probably because you're doin' better than him, dattebayo," 

"What?" Sakura momentarily forgot her irritation at Sasuke as she reeled from shock. Her? Better than Sasuke? That seemed like the punchline to a bad joke. 

Even if it's a joke, Sakura should be happy, right? She's doing better than the rookie of the year. But she still couldn't quell the slight irrational guilt brewing inside her. 

"Hm? Yeah you're way better than that bastard at waterwalking!" Naruto cheerfully slapped her on the back in an effort to cheer her up. "But don't forget to teach me, okay? I can't fall behind you too, dattebayo!" 

"Yeah," Sakura agreed absentminded and frowned down at her noodles. 

Naruto seemed to notice that as well, "What's up Sakura-chan? Aren't you happy?" 

Sakura shrugged as she stirred her noodles, "I don't know? Like part of me is happy but another part feels bad for doing better than Sasuke," 

The confession made her feel slightly better, but Sakura was still frustrated. She's improving! She has better chakra control than anybody her age and managed to figure out waterwalking on the first try! So why did she feel bad?

"I think it's because you're too nice, Sakura-chan," Naruto said as he flagged down Teuchi-jisan for another bowl, "You don't like seeing Sasuke upset so even though you're happy, it's over-shadow-ed by your guilt, dattebayo." 

Sakura blinked. Then blinked again as she processed what Naruto, who was happily eating his ramen as if he didn't just dissect Sakura's entire personality, spilt across her lap. 

"Huh, I guess you're right. Also, nice vocabulary," 

Naruto beamed, "Of course I'm right! I'm future Hokage! I gotta know how people think, dattebayo. 'Parently I also gotta use bigger words, so Iruka-sensei's been teaching me!" 

Sakura smiled and was about to go back to her ramen, but Naruto wasn't done yet. 

"Also, that's what rivalries are all about, dattebayo! We can't improve if we're all strong in the same things," 

"Why're you so wise and smart today?" Sakura smiled as she felt something settle in her, Naruto's right! If she's going to be part of Sasuke and Naruto's rivalry then she has to be able to challenge them! 

"Cha! I'm gonna get stronger and stronger, no matter how many hissy fits Sasuke throws! I won't fall behind!" 

Sakura raised her hand to Naruto and they both bumped each other fists in agreement. They cleared their dishes soon after that and just as Sakura was contemplating offering to fix Naruto's hair, he stood up suddenly with a loud screech of his stool. 

"Shit! I forgot I was supposed to play with Konohamaru and his friends today! I gotta go Sakura-chan!" 

Sakura waved him off with a smile as he hollered at Teuchi ji-san to "put it on Kakashi-sensei's tab, dattebayo!" 

She planned to go look for Lee, but as didn't need to look for long as she turned a corner and ran straight into him. 

"Lee!" Sakura brightly exclaimed as she pushed herself off the ground. 

"Sakura!," Lee replied just as enthusiastically before his eyes widened when he saw her hair, "Sakura? What happened to your hair?" 

"Oh it's nothing," Sakura waved him off as she pulled him to his feet, wiping dirt off his green jumpsuit that she's growing to hate less wth every meeting, "just a training accident. You should see Naruto and Sasuke though, they look way worse," 

Besides, on average it takes one month to grow one centimeter of hair, but it all depends on race, gender, and ethnicity...." 

Sakura's voice tapered off as her face went red. Damn, she's been rambling again. 

"Sakura! It is most admirable how knowledgable you are!"

"Oh," Sakra felt her cheeks go red again, but for a different reason, "You don't think it's annoying?" 

"Hardly! 'What we can't refine in body we must refine in body and soul!' is what Gai-sensei always says!" 

Lee struck another pose and Sakura laughed, relieved. 

"Wanna go train together? I think I got the hang of waterwalking," 

Sakura's depleted chakra was back at normal levels after inhaling three bowls of ramen, so she's confident in her ability to not belly flop into a lake. 

"Yosh! Let's go!" 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sooo how was it?? I'll admit my month long absence was also encouraged by my slight writers block but then I pushed out like 3 Boruto fics in two weeks and figured, eh might as well give this a shot.  
> speaking of Boruto, the shows not bad if u watch it like a badly written comedy/slice of life. imo the fillers (most of the show lol) were better than the actual canon episodes.  
> as for this chapter, it's more of me suddenly thinking team 7 dynamics are the shit after months of avoiding them. and kind of explaining Sasuke's attitude because he's dramatic.  
> Naruto not being book smart at all but knowing his way around people is just *muah*  
> also whoever started the hc that iruka teaches Naruto to expand his vocabulary and that Naruto carefully pronounces long words can have my firstborn


	18. pain of a previously destroyed relationship is temporary, swag is forever

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ayyoo nearly two weeks later but I'm back!!! I'd like to say that those long breaks make me write longer chapters but I'd be lying so y'all get absolute crumbs from me that I personally scraped off of the floor, but it's on a decorative frog platter so it cancels out PEMDAS style.

"Wait- wait, that's it, you got it!" 

Sakura did a weird jiggly dance while sitting down, fingers firmly maintaining the hand signs for the genjutu she had put Lee under. 

Kakashi-sensei had mentioned getting outside help, but Sakura had already started her own training. Cooking, morning runs, even D-ranks were just ways for her to memorize different scents, smells, textures and tastes. 

Of course, reading books from the shinobi section of the library and awkwardly trying to explain to the old lady who hired her team to paint her walls that, no ma'am, she was not trying to kill herself by drinking paint, weren't as effective as hands on learning, but Sakura will do with what she had, for now. 

And what she had now was trapping her first ever boyfriend in a genjutsu while simultaneously trying to cheer him on and keeping him under said genjutsu. 

Sakura furrowed her brow as she felt another nudge at her carefully crafted genjutsu, a simple one that blocks out certain noises, like her own voice. She sheepishly scratched at her cheek with her shoulder when she remembered Lee couldn't hear her, that's the whole point, but she was too excited. 

Lee in turn was looking extremely perplexed, and Sakura had to stifle a giggle. A cool thing about genjutsu is that even if you realize you're in one, it doesn't necessarily mean you can break out of it. Genjutsu itself was extremely fascinating, and Sakura didn't get why it's not taught in more depth at the academy, especially when it's not that hard to grasp. 

But then again, she mused as Lee covered and uncovered his ears with a baffled expression and wildly flared his chakra, there are students like Naruto that just don't get the knack of things. 

But that's mean to say, or even think. Naruto excelled in areas she was absolutely abysmal at, like traps and taijutsu. Kinda. Sakura didn't know if Naruto's unrefined brawler style qualified as taijutsu but he definitely sucked less than her and landed more hits. Man, she'd give anything to be better at taijutsu than at genjutsu, it seems much more useful. 

No! She has to be positive, determined. Complaining won't get her anything, only training would. Sakura nodded to herself and mentally planned to give Naruto a nice fruit basket as a silent apology for slandering him in her head, it would do him good to eat something other than copious amounts of ramen. 

"Yosh!" 

Sakura startled at Lee's sudden outburst, momentarily breaking her concentration as releasing the genjutsu. 

"Wha - That isn't fair!" Sakura sputtered as she flailed on the ground, slumped over in defeat. Lee just laughed, and how dare he - can't he see she's humiliated, and collapsed next to her. For a while, neither spoke as they both tried to catch their breaths, both unfamiliar and untrained in using chakra for such long periods. 

"This is fun," Sakura said out loud, surprised when the thought flitted through her mind. 

Lee flashed her a blinding grin, "Training is always fun! There's nothing better than seeing your own improvement!" 

"Yeah? And who said that, your sensei?" Sakura teased, folding her arms behind her head. The air was nice and she felt oddly happy that she got half her hair shorn off, she could finally feel the breeze on her nape. 

"Nope, that's all me!" Lee proudly exclaimed, and Sakura huffed in amusement. They both fell back into silence and watched the clouds, painted pink by the setting sun. 

But even with the breeze and the pastel sky, Salura felt a familiar coil of distress worm it's way into her stomach. 

Training was never fun in her experience, maybe when she was younger and new friends with Ino, but after she tore their friendship apart it became a humiliating ordeal for Sakura. Lack of training kept her out of shape which made training hard and grueling, which in turn made her practical performance at the academy drop. It was a cycle of Sakura trying to get back in shape and then getting embarrassed by her lack of physical abilities. 

But she was working on that, wasn't she? She's training with Lee, with her team, even Kakashi-sensei, so that's not the issue. Was it Ino? Hadn't she mended her relationship with her? 

Sakura already knew the answer; a big fat 'no' as broad as her forehead. Sure, she apologized and they hugged, but Sakura didn't really explain her emotions to Ino. For all she knew, Ino genuinely thought that Sakura dropped their relationship only for Sasuke, and not a desperate attempt to make her acknowledge Sakura. 

She wanted to clear the air, for things to go back, perhaps not the same as before, but back to when Sakura could tell Ino anything and vice versa. She wanted sleepovers and hair braiding sessions and random facts about plants to be part of her life again, and not just the comfort that when Sakura spots Ino in a crowd, she'd be met by at least a smile and a toss of hair. 

But her actions felt so stupid, so dumb, that she feared Ino wouldn't accept her explanations and apologies. 

Sakura cleared her throat, "Hey Lee?" 

Lee tore his gaze away from the now purple tinted clouds to face her, "Yeah?"

"Say, hypothetically, you messed up and ruined a relationship and then kinda fixed it, but it's still a bit wonky. Like wonky but still stable," Sakura made a face at whatever word vomit just left her mouth but continued when Lee motioned at her to go on, "and you can say something that might fix it but it also might ruin it way more, what would you do?" 

"Go for it," Lee said bluntly, and Sakura really didn't expect anything else, but she still laughed, "I mean, hypothetically," 

"And, hypothetically," Lee continued, "if that person did not accept the apology, then at least you know you did your best," 

"Thanks Lee, you're really good at these hypothetical problems," Sakura giggled. 

She settled back into the grass, still laughing, and tilted her head up to watch the clouds. Lee was right, even if Ino still wanted to maintain that brittle distance between them, Sakura couldn't say she completely walked out of that relationship. She wouldn't have any future regrets or what-ifs and, in a best case scenario, she would have her best friend back. 

"It's getting late," Lee noted as they both watched the rolling clouds turn a darker shade of purple, "we should probably go home," 

Sakura stood up and brushed the grass off of her pants - she really missed her dresses - and pulled Lee up. 

Their companionable silence lasted until they reached a fork in the road, where Sakura was just going through another internal debate of whether a goodbye hug was too much, before she slapped her hand against her forehead. 

"Sakura?" Lee cried in alarm, "is everything okay?" 

"My hair! My parents will kill me!" Sakura realized, grabbing fistfuls of her chopped off hair. 

Lee's concerns and mild panic melted away into relief and, the audacity, laughter. 

"Don't - don't laugh! This is a serious concern!" 

More laughter. 

"I'll chop your hair off, cha!" 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so I kinda realize I forgot about Sakura actually going after Sasuke for Ino to acknowledge her or something blah blah and I didn't include it in that Sakura-Ino bathroom reconciliation scene so I included it here. I'd be upset about my own inconsistency but this makes things more ✨organic✨ so I'm lettin it slide.  
> more actual sakulee content lmaoo.  
> and for Sakura just being weirdly op w the genjutsu thing, it's not really explored in cannon which is synonymous with ill do whatever the fuck I want because technically no one can tell me otherwise. and genjutsu isn't that explored either so I'm just making things up as I go. Sakura just has that really good chakra control AND good memory to fabricate genjutsu. also low self esteem + overpowered teammates = thinking that anything that comes easy to you is a simple topic that can be approached by anybody (long name for the 'u ain't shit syndrome')  
> ALSO- pleasedial123 bookmarked this and I hyperventilated for nearly three days and pissed myself, weird hq fanart style (iykyk).  
> another irrelevant note, y'all MUST listen to to butch 4 butch simping by rio romeo its simply art (also has out of tune piano and if thats not a selling point then idk what is)  
> another thing, S4 AOT ep1 just dropped holyyyyy shit the first episode was fireeee I loved it also the op???? please it's on loop 24/7

**Author's Note:**

> kudos and comments are appreciated!!! also dont be afraid to criticize me im always up for improvements!! this is gonna be multichapter and ill try to keep a regular update schedule but no promises!


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